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Your thoughts show how much you care and come with understanding, through it all.. that's great.
posted by
yellowrose55
on September 5, 2010 at 3:41 PM
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Thanks Sam.
posted by
CringeintheUSA
on September 5, 2010 at 3:14 PM
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I think it is tremendous the resentment is disappearing for as you say, it is to your benefit, too! At least there is contact! I think the perfect mom were only on TV land! sam
posted by
sam444
on August 27, 2010 at 12:02 AM
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BC-A, thanks, I think you're right.
posted by
CringeintheUSA
on August 26, 2010 at 3:29 PM
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Re: All I can say -- it's her loss. I'd adopt you in a heartbeat...
Pat_B, I'd be honored. I used to obsess over her abandonment when I fell pregnant with Leone, I mean, my last trimester was spend talking about it daily and still feeling shocked that she could do it. However, I'm glad she did, she would have done a lot more damage otherwise.
I think what you tell yourself and what you feel don't often reconcile themselves, but, it's a step in the right direction.
posted by
CringeintheUSA
on August 26, 2010 at 3:29 PM
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dancin_grandma I am sorry to hear that
it's not easy growing up with that, but your granddaughter having someone constant in her life keeps it from becoming a lot worse. You don't have the freedom to grieve for someone when they're still living and under the impression that they're the same person they always were, when to you, they are completely lost.
posted by
CringeintheUSA
on August 26, 2010 at 3:22 PM
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All I can say -- it's her loss. I'd adopt you in a heartbeat...
I know something about toxic mothers. Only took 60 years to come to terms with the things I grew up with. Now I know her hostility had nothing whatsoever to do with me. Her distress was not my fault. It's one thing to say it, quite another to feel it.
posted by
Pat_B
on August 26, 2010 at 4:58 AM
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My granddaughter could probably write this same post some years from now. I recognized my daughter in your mother.
posted by
dancin_grandma
on August 26, 2010 at 3:27 AM
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{ I guess that you have to go with your feeling about it. BC-A, Bill’s RJLst
posted by
BC-A
on August 26, 2010 at 12:03 AM
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