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I am returning and even though its the same post wanted you to know I was here.  :-)

posted by Sinome on February 14, 2009 at 9:35 PM | link to this | reply

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it is individual people like me, and you, goodwhiskey, who have allowed this mind set to flourish - about time then that people like us, now made way for another. thanks for visiting and please come by again

posted by bythewindowsill on February 11, 2009 at 11:06 PM | link to this | reply

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many thanks, Sinome- i look forward to your return

posted by bythewindowsill on February 11, 2009 at 11:00 PM | link to this | reply

A wonderful post with so much truth about the urban mindset. It's pitiful. But there is always hope when even one like you decides to make a difference. Cheers. Will be back to read more.

posted by goodwhisky on February 11, 2009 at 2:12 AM | link to this | reply

Beautifully written... Its my first time here I think but I will forsure return :-)

posted by Sinome on February 10, 2009 at 10:48 PM | link to this | reply

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thanks ex.

posted by bythewindowsill on February 5, 2009 at 10:01 PM | link to this | reply

Re: You make some really valid points here
thankyou

posted by bythewindowsill on February 5, 2009 at 10:01 PM | link to this | reply

This is a beautifully written and balanced post.

posted by EX_TURPI on February 5, 2009 at 9:58 AM | link to this | reply

You make some really valid points here
and in a very eloquent style. I'll be back

posted by malcolm on February 4, 2009 at 5:54 AM | link to this | reply

Re: I copied this post and read it at work...

thankyou, metalrat  i am overwhelmed!!  WOW you !

while i am still tugging 'reluctantly' to reclaim my head from the heavens   i cannot tell you how gratifying it is that my message is out.; the few of you who have read it, have taken away something (in my opinion, urgent and important) to think about. metal, you certainly have - i thank you again. some thought like this and maybe we could just about  turn things around at least for our children.

thanks to you and all my readers, specially with this piece, i truly feel like i have achieved something here.

posted by bythewindowsill on February 3, 2009 at 11:26 PM | link to this | reply

I copied this post and read it at work...
...and all I can say is WOW!
There is so much truth and wisdom in all of your observations and your eloquent candor is so refreshing...

Our self-contained, high-walled existence has not only removed us from the larger world we live in, it has also made us disdainful of it. Anyone asking after our wellbeing, is an interference. Someone else walking on the same pavement is an infringement. That friendly offer to alleviate trouble, is audacity.

This is our day. And this is what we learn: you are nice because you are not good enough to be bad, you are helpful because you don’t value yourself and if you value another, it’s because you don’t have a life!

And I thought these attitudes were strickly a Western mindset, but, apparently, the West distributes more than just fashion and movies to the rest of the world.

This is one of the best posts I've ever read on blogit. Well done, BTWS!  

posted by metalrat on February 3, 2009 at 6:14 PM | link to this | reply

Re: I came here on Naut's recommendation, and I really am gald that I did

most welcome to my page, kabu  and thanks for visiting. to naut, thanks again.

the past is gone and the future is not visible (well, not all that clearly, really). though not in quality, but what we do have is the present in time, - and that is enough reason to hold on to what the past has left us and build something out of that for the future. what do you say? should i get the ribbons ready?  

posted by bythewindowsill on February 3, 2009 at 12:55 AM | link to this | reply

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mal, thanks immensely and welcome here .

my feelings have been drawn out in response to naut's comment. please do read it - wouldn't want to risk repeating too much . though there are various reservations, your walk to 20 instant friends is exactly what my son is getting a taste of here in india, and he loves it - i, i am just thankful. if only the world outside continued as an extension of college - but i am a hopeless hopeful and i will dream

look forward to seeing you around too :)

posted by bythewindowsill on February 3, 2009 at 12:44 AM | link to this | reply

Re: by

hello there!

i am so touched that you feel strongly enough to say all that you have said here. this indeed is a universal condition, naut - india just shows a glimpse of it. I never took it seriously in London, and would never have. i guess the realisation of the extent to which it has disintegrated us, came to me only because of the contrast i see here in india.

the traditional culture in India is very very family-based. 'family' being not just blood relations but all that come along. look at it- the culture does not allow any person older than self to be addressd by name. in the same generation, boys are brothers (depending on the linguistic region, specific terms clearly indicate the age hierarchy) and girls are sisters. similarly,  generations above consists only of uncles and aunts and grandparents. it is not something i understood for a very long time- and admittedly (though now i am sheepish about it)even found amusing to a point. but now i see and 'understand' the kind of 'respect' that forms the basis of life here. fascinating and utterly commendable.  

placing the modern attitude (essentially a western influence) against this traditional base, brought about a contrast that really shook me.

again, naut, thanks for grasping my point so well. and i notice you have even recco'ed me - you are a star . many thanks.

posted by bythewindowsill on February 3, 2009 at 12:17 AM | link to this | reply

I came here on Naut's recommendation, and I really am gald that I did
I am sad for all that todays world has thrown away with such careless abandonment and disregard for the future.

posted by Kabu on February 2, 2009 at 10:17 PM | link to this | reply

This is an amazing piece of work.  I was thinking about this very topic as I was walking around my neighborhood today and passed my next door neighbor driving away.  In the 5 years she has lived there, I've spoken to her twice.  It is utterly sad to feel so alienated from people who live a hundred yards away from us. But that is the state of our world today.  As a kid, I was so tied into our neighborhood - I'd walk outside on a snowy or warm day and have 20 instant friends to play with.  My two older teenage sons grew up with the "drive-to" playdates, they had to get into a car in order to see friends.  When they get to college, they will understand the joys and camaraderie of a close-knit group of people.  I look forward to more of your writing.  Mal

posted by gapcohen on February 2, 2009 at 3:35 PM | link to this | reply

by
I am floored! Something I am attempting to come to terms with analytically, intellectually, from a distance, trying to understand a condition that is not just India's but still ours as well, you express in a poetic way that carries the weight of your emotinal involvement, and hence is extremely powerful...

posted by Nautikos on February 2, 2009 at 12:48 PM | link to this | reply

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all the warmth in the world lies hidden right where it belongs - in our hearts. it is just that the world outside of it has turned too cold to see it. :( but the sun still shines (like i keep saying) and it will get warm again. hope is good. thanks for your comment and welcome here .

posted by bythewindowsill on January 31, 2009 at 9:39 AM | link to this | reply

I live in that hope. I dream of a place where my child will delight in pleasures of the togetherness that I (to a large extent) enjoyed

Touching post ...i dream and aches for the togethrness too ..searching for it in all the corners ..what did happen to the world ..where the warmth gone

posted by drohan254 on January 31, 2009 at 3:55 AM | link to this | reply

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hey snow, thanks! you got it - we have become too self centered and so need to change, don't you think?

i will be spending a few days looking at what all you guys have been upto all this while i've been away - i can already see i've missed some very exciting stuff. hope to see more from you and hope to put some more of my own too :) thanks again

posted by bythewindowsill on January 31, 2009 at 3:55 AM | link to this | reply

Re: by the windowsill, welcome back..you really have given us a lot to think
thankyou for that welcome, Rumor . i am glad my purpose with this piece has hit home.

posted by bythewindowsill on January 31, 2009 at 3:51 AM | link to this | reply

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TAPS . it took a string of incidents and a very sorted chat that got 'me' thinking about all of this and realising some very mundane yet heavily implicating things about the way we go about life. i can see we're on the same page.

posted by bythewindowsill on January 31, 2009 at 3:49 AM | link to this | reply

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i am glad you felt so, vogue. my job is done. thankyou.

posted by bythewindowsill on January 31, 2009 at 3:44 AM | link to this | reply

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sam, you really have a great way with words- and i don't just mean your posts . thankyou so much for your generous comments- they are always so encouraging, so comforting. and obviously, very looked forward to .

posted by bythewindowsill on January 31, 2009 at 3:43 AM | link to this | reply

Welcome back....missed your posts! And thanks for a great, thought provoking piece. I think most people are too selfish and preoccupied with themselves and the immediate family  and frineds to make the effort to interact with others, leave alone help or support anyone. Thanks too for stopping by, and commenting on my post. Hope to see more of your posts soon! Nita.

posted by Nita09 on January 31, 2009 at 2:09 AM | link to this | reply

by the windowsill, welcome back..you really have given us a lot to think
about...this is a composition I will red over many times and glean something new each time...thanks for sharing in such a clear and visual way......

posted by Rumor on January 30, 2009 at 8:22 PM | link to this | reply

What a post, bythewindowsill.  It really makes the head hurt pondering all of that.  Yes so many things have changed in my lifetime and one of them is me.  I have changed tremendously.  And, I don't even think about those changes in me until I read something like this.  So glad you are posting again whenever you can.

posted by TAPS. on January 30, 2009 at 5:11 PM | link to this | reply

A wonderful post with many many important insights.

posted by vogue on January 30, 2009 at 3:25 PM | link to this | reply

But how will we know, if we shy away from knowing? What an utterly poignant statement! Wow! What an essay! It is so wonderful what a smile can do, lead to an afternoon tea, then become contagious, then known for that smile! Wow! I feel so bad for your young son, it is never easy! This is just a marvelous composition! I am so pleased and honored to have been able to read it! Take care my wonderful friend! sam

posted by sam444 on January 30, 2009 at 9:10 AM | link to this | reply

 It has been a while - a rather long while, i  know- but with things still to settle, i am not sure when the next entry will come about. this one was instigated by an after-dinner chat with my son's teacher.

a young family member passed on. my son turned 7 the day after that. he had a lot to understand at such a tender age. there is always something terrible on the news. and yet the sun shines brilliantly (one definite reason i am glad not to be in london these days!!!). 

there are still too many thougts to word but i will let them be hued by yours. the canvas stands open. it sure feels good to be back

posted by bythewindowsill on January 30, 2009 at 5:46 AM | link to this | reply