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Re: FineYoungSinger, I'll be grand, there comes a point when you
Cringe, it's quite true. Being a doormat is exactly whan many people count on--they expect people to be so afraid of any kind of confrontation or backlash that they walk all over someone that is just trying to be nice. When it does come, Cringe, be strong!
posted by
FineYoungSinger
on November 5, 2007 at 4:17 AM
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FineYoungSinger, I'll be grand, there comes a point when you
wear out being polite, and you have to stand up for yourself.....I think it's coming soon.
posted by
CringeintheUSA
on November 4, 2007 at 5:32 PM
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Re: Thanks for showing me the path to short-lived success, seems marginally
awww Cringe...believe me, I've been there. It will pass.
posted by
FineYoungSinger
on November 4, 2007 at 5:25 PM
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Thanks for showing me the path to short-lived success, seems marginally
better than being the newbie who's blamed for everything that has nothing to do with her........yes, I'm bitter........
posted by
CringeintheUSA
on November 4, 2007 at 5:23 PM
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Re:
Hi sam, thanks so much for reading!
posted by
FineYoungSinger
on November 4, 2007 at 5:09 PM
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Re: FineYoungSinger
TAPS, it's scary, isn't it, that people can be this selfish and self-absorbed? Thanks so much for reading!
posted by
FineYoungSinger
on November 4, 2007 at 5:09 PM
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Re: Excellent read; all too familiar: Chyrlann, O M G !!!!
Just when I thought I'd heard it all!!! WHEWWW!!! What an ordeal you've lived! wow. Well, as you said, Karma is a bitch.
posted by
FineYoungSinger
on November 4, 2007 at 5:08 PM
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AMEN!!! SAM
posted by
sam444
on November 4, 2007 at 12:45 PM
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FineYoungSinger
Since I've been retired for three years now, I've almost forgotten that sort of thing goes on--almost but not quite.
posted by
TAPS.
on November 4, 2007 at 12:31 PM
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Excellent read; all too familiar. My second husband was extraordinarily
attractive and suave, half Italian/Spanish, rather a Tony Danza look alike. I was young, vulnerable and swept. He swept his way into the US from Costa Rica at age 17 utilizing his looks & charm; I nauseatingly discovered late in our marriage he had been 'kept' by a wealthy, elderly gentleman from FL whom had procured his Visa, etc., and he had 'made his way' across the US to WA through his gifted techniques of swooning woman. The third year into the marriage (he was 23, I 28), I discovered I was the 4th (wrung on his ladder) and now at 43, he is on number 6. His occupation is in car sales, management and now owns a dealership in CA. We share a son so I remain (not interested) but well informed. His 'collaboration' with wife number 5 sent their joint assets into the one million dollar club. He illegally transferred title on my vehicle through the dealership and they had quit claimed my name on our home before the divorce papers were finalized. I wasn't allowed my vehicle until I signed the divorce papers giving him full assets and me debt. I lost everything (except the vehicle), including the family home I owned before we met and was forced into bankruptcy.
I returned to the dealership where our story ended to buy my new car recently. He had, in the six years of our marriage, had affairs with three woman salespersons there and the last was with the owner's assistant who became wrung number five on his financial climb. Many of the salesman recognized me from twelve years prior. While dealing with the finance manager in negotiating a price for my new car, the assistant manager stuck his head in the door and asked, "Do you know who this woman is?" The financial manager, seeing my maiden name did not. The assistant manager informed him, "She's so & so's (they had a nickname for my ex husband), ex wife. We already screwed her several times, don't be doing it again." The financial manager's face turned crimson. The asking price was $22G...I needed $18G. I got my new car for $18G.
My son recently informed me he is separated from wife number 6, has filed bankruptcy and is in the process of renegotiating his contract with the dealership and may lose it also. Karma is a bitch and even though it may take a decade or better to find your ass, sooner or later it'll bite ya!
posted by
roadscross
on November 4, 2007 at 12:01 PM
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Re: Yeah, just think, they get to be themselves for the rest of their lives
You know Zena, I wonder that same thing. It's like instead of acking for themselves, they are looking for a set of coat tails to come riding in on.
posted by
FineYoungSinger
on November 3, 2007 at 11:24 AM
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Yeah, just think, they get to be themselves for the rest of their lives
I think it takes some soul-searching and self-inventory to recognize when a person is at fault, humble themselves, admit they made a mistake and try to make amends. I really admire that. That takes courage.
But being fake, they're only fooling themselves and then at some point, do they ever see it in themselves and just shudder?
posted by
Zena77
on November 3, 2007 at 11:19 AM
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Re: LOL, Fine, nice imagery
Amen to that, Zena. I really feel bad for people that do not live authentically.
posted by
FineYoungSinger
on November 3, 2007 at 11:15 AM
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LOL, Fine, nice imagery
It's frustrating watching that sometimes. There was someone like that at my old firm. It felt like being tested with the patience of Job just to show up to work everyday. Over time, things worked out, of course, but it was exhausting on a daily basis.
As a friend of mine put it, though, "They have to live their entire lives being who they are," We at least have the luxury of getting away and not dealing with them ever again.
posted by
Zena77
on November 3, 2007 at 10:33 AM
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Re: Freakin' phonies suck dead bears.
justanotherskinnybitch, how true. thanks for reading!
posted by
FineYoungSinger
on November 3, 2007 at 10:23 AM
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Re:
Hi Kayzzaman, thanks for reading--I was only a bystander through this little drama. I worked in the art department. But all that drama out of sales made the rest of us suffer.
posted by
FineYoungSinger
on November 3, 2007 at 10:22 AM
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EX TURPI, you've left words to live by here. Thank you!
posted by
FineYoungSinger
on November 3, 2007 at 10:21 AM
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Freakin' phonies suck dead bears.
posted by
justanotherskinnybitch
on November 3, 2007 at 10:02 AM
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Nice to go through your experience, Singer.
posted by
Kayzzaman
on November 3, 2007 at 9:48 AM
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It happens all the time. It causes problems. The culture rewards such action. Yet: 'To thine own self be true; And it follows as the night, the day; thou canst then be false to any one' Shakespeare.
posted by
EX_TURPI
on November 3, 2007 at 9:26 AM
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Re:
afzal, that was the finest of compliments! Thank you!!!
posted by
FineYoungSinger
on November 3, 2007 at 9:16 AM
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posted by
afzal50
on November 3, 2007 at 9:15 AM
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Degrees, rich. There's a huge difference between seeing something that
works and incorporating it into your existence, and outright asskissing. Thanks for reading!
posted by
FineYoungSinger
on November 3, 2007 at 9:14 AM
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FYS
it's human nature. We learn through copying and imitating others (either good or bad). Take care
posted by
richinstore
on November 3, 2007 at 9:09 AM
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