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Cracking last two lines! Great piece. Keep going....

posted by SpencerStreetStation on August 14, 2007 at 1:38 AM | link to this | reply

now you are cookin.
yeah yeah and yeah , say what you feel , feel what you say
it makes such for a great fuckin' day, Hey Young Lady , it is great to see you enter the other regions of your mind and sharing with us a glimpse inside .KEEP IT UP !!!!!!!

posted by twomany on August 10, 2007 at 10:46 PM | link to this | reply

Hey thanks to all for the compliments
and I fixed line nine thanks

posted by spanish_dragon on August 9, 2007 at 6:41 PM | link to this | reply

Cool...good poem!

posted by dark_mistress_again on August 8, 2007 at 11:37 PM | link to this | reply

dragon--
I thought this was dark but very well written. You might want to fix the typo in your ninth line, though.

posted by Julia. on August 8, 2007 at 10:21 PM | link to this | reply

spanish
very deep dear

posted by Lanetay on August 8, 2007 at 9:23 PM | link to this | reply

It's nice and lovely . WEll written!

posted by afzal50 on August 8, 2007 at 6:20 PM | link to this | reply