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Scottie
Your words are thoughtful. Thanks.
posted by
missjohn316
on January 31, 2007 at 11:43 AM
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Talion
Thanks for the encouragement.
posted by
missjohn316
on January 31, 2007 at 11:42 AM
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I totally agree with you.
Men want and need to feel confident, capable, and to have the security of knowing that they are going to be loved, even when they fail at things. It's true that their ego can be easily shattered by a woman that they open up to--they don't want to be seen as a failure in her eyes. He wants to feel that he is the man that you need him to be. The fact that he cares, shows that he does want to be a better man, and he needs your encouragement and support.
posted by
ScottieBuchan
on January 30, 2007 at 6:02 PM
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I do feel safe with her, but that wasn't always the case. We had to learn how to deal with each other, figure out the things we should and shouldn't say, and how to say it. It wasn't always easy. I was often reluctant to share my feelings with her, especially if it involved those emotions I considered "weak." Sometimes we hurt each other, and there were times when I wondered if she was really worth it all. It takes time and effort to make a relationship work. All meaningful relationships go through the rocky and hard times. A perfect one doesn't exist. Your realization that the subtle things can hurt him is a big step. His finding the "real" meaning behind these subtle things is an equally big step. Make it together and you have something truly special.
posted by
Talion
on January 30, 2007 at 10:41 AM
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Talion
That's because you feel safe with your wife. You know that she loves you even if she says something that you don't want to hear.
My guy hesitates to bare his soul to me because I might exploit his weakness. I've done it before and I regret it now. It will take a while before he can feel safe around me again.
posted by
missjohn316
on January 30, 2007 at 10:03 AM
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Thanks for sharing the power of your looks .
posted by
afzal50
on January 30, 2007 at 9:32 AM
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missjohn316
Ariel70 expressed my sentiments exactly. My wife doesn't walk on eggshells in my presence, but she never hesitates to speak her mind, even if it's something I don't want to hear. The way we communicate is just as important as what is said.
posted by
Talion
on January 30, 2007 at 9:23 AM
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missjohn
Could all that not be said of the vulnerable female ego?
And if it is an effort for you to make that commitment, then you don't have the right man.
The avoidance of doing and saying hurtful things to the loved one should not be a duty ; it should be instinctive.
Be well, amiga.
posted by
ariel70
on January 30, 2007 at 9:06 AM
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