Comments on Bringing Down Blanche – An Absolutely Loathsome Episode

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Going by what PayB says, maybe we at blogit need some training from a

crisis counsellor types about how to respond through writing to a person with a bipolar disorder? How would that happen? from the admin blog? or a separate blog? Or....?

posted by Straightforward on February 1, 2007 at 8:01 PM | link to this | reply

I've come to your blog late, because I avoid the political category...

Thank you Blogflogger for your thoughtful reporting on manic depressive disorder, and your editorial about the contributions we might have made to the meltdown of a friend. I really miss reading Blanche's blogs, especially her accounts of walks in Seattle and what goes on at the coffee house. I am still very sad and upset about the meltdown.

I have some experience with mentally ill - fragile - persons. 

I ran a service office on campus. Some of our students were recovering addicts on methodone. One came in - very agitated and desperate - having slipped and taken a drink earlier in the day. This made him dangerous if confronted with hostility. I listened respectfully for ten or fifteen minutes, and we made an appointment for later that day to deal with the "official" problem. I knew the chemicals in his blood would wear off and he'd be rational by then. Finally, I got him to leave.

What scared me was my staff. They made angry comments about what they'd have done in the face of his rude behavior. They didn't have a clue that he was so close to the razor's edge. If I had been away when he came in, and they had reacted unprofessionally, somebody would have gotten hurt. I called in a crisis counselor and got them trained within the week. 

 

posted by Pat_B on January 31, 2007 at 7:42 AM | link to this | reply

Wiley, Blanche and I keep in touch via email, too.

She is recovering from her episode, and has regretted the language she use, but I still maintain she was provoked and that the whole incident was disgraceful. 

She will rise above it, and move on.  Shame on many here for their part in this. They know who they are. Enough said.

posted by blogflogger on January 29, 2007 at 8:46 PM | link to this | reply

Blogflogger

I am always a day late and a dollar shy but I was a friend to Blanche and still am. We communicate by e-mail mostly in kind of a father/daughter type of relationship.

Of course I knew of her condition and being a recovering alcoholic of nearly 40 years sobriety, and a widower, I was very saddened by the events that she experienced.

You wrote a good post about it but I'm not sure what the correct answer is.  I didn't get involved or read the words she spoke, still, that can be frightening to the receiver or the focus of that anger.

Blanche is doing fine, she is involved with writing elsewhere for now, and we keep in touch.

 

posted by WileyJohn on January 29, 2007 at 8:43 PM | link to this | reply

Happy New Year!

posted by Nautikos on December 31, 2006 at 11:51 AM | link to this | reply

LOL I only like cracked people

because girl, I am a far cry from uncracked myself!!!

posted by bel_1965 on December 19, 2006 at 9:27 AM | link to this | reply

Thanks Bel, think I'm a little cracked myself though.

posted by CringeintheUSA on December 19, 2006 at 9:20 AM | link to this | reply

Whinge

You are a good egg!!!!

posted by bel_1965 on December 19, 2006 at 9:17 AM | link to this | reply

Parnell, you seem to have got the idea that I hold bloggers responsible for another's mental health. I categorically don't, although I have seen this misinformation asserted by others too. Perhaps you have got me wrong by reading words about me, rather than by me. I agree with your 'cannot possibly' statement. What I do hold all bloggers responsible for is for controlling their own behaviour and words so that they are acting within the rules of the site. The psychological and emotional abuse dealt out to Blanche is contrary to the site's Conduct Policy. Concerning the specifics of this case, I've made my representations to Blogit rather than publishing them. Concerning how we conduct ourselves in the future, I've a lot more to say. And will be saying some today, should you decide to read.

Additionally, people have already found other places to publish their articles and stories, having become tired of certain behaviour on this site. I've thought about it several times myself.

Your final statement is wrong and cruel in the circumstances.

posted by _dave_says_ack_ on December 19, 2006 at 4:33 AM | link to this | reply

To follow up on my below comment, I've no wish to exchange cross words with

you Parnell, and I'm sorry you didn't witness the Blanche everyone is sorry to see leave.

I hope overall, that your experiences on Blogit are worth the membership.

posted by CringeintheUSA on December 19, 2006 at 4:24 AM | link to this | reply

Parnell, .Dave is just honestly speaking about it, which is a welcome

change around here, to have something said without agenda or insinuation. 

There has been a huge amount of exchanges going both directions for some time, there are parties who prefer to dress it up and insinuate and there are those who prefer to just come right out and say it as the former gets quite tiring.

As you say, other people can't be held accountable for Blanche's reactions in view of her mental health, so along the same vein .Dave doesn't neccessarily need to be held accountable for pointing out obvious truths to others either.

There are certain facts that can't be overlooked on this issue on boths sides, one huge one is there was only one of Blanche, not exactly a fair match.  Irrespective of mental health, just not right in principle when taking in to account overall character.

This thing has been going on for a long, long, time.

posted by CringeintheUSA on December 19, 2006 at 4:17 AM | link to this | reply

A General Remark

Some of the comments on this thread are silly, verging on childish.

The obvious truth is that writers on this website cannot possibly be held responsible for the mental health of other bloggers who they hardly know - whether those bloggers happen to be Dave's mates or not.

I don't abuse people on this website. But neither am I in a position to take care of their nursing. If logging on means being berated by Dave every two days about this nonsense, then people will just find other places to publish their articles and stories.

P.S. - Everybody knows that Blanche is blogging as Professor Peabody, and she seems just fine...

posted by Antipodean on December 19, 2006 at 3:27 AM | link to this | reply

What gets me about all this is the complete over reaction.

If as a new member, I was unsure of someone, I would go back along historically & read their posts (as I have done with a lot of people here) to assess what kind of person they are before so readily condemning them on their current behaviour or forming a concrete opinion on same.

Blanche & I got along well from the start, & I would show no hesitance in having her in my home or in my life were we not an ocean apart.

That she was goaded, I don't doubt.  That she should've stepped back, I don't doubt either, but then it's difficult to have self discipline in a place that has become such a huge part of your life.

My best wishes to her in all respects, I know she is being looked after.

posted by CringeintheUSA on December 19, 2006 at 2:49 AM | link to this | reply

Chilitree, thank you. It's important that those who quietly agree say so.

posted by _dave_says_ack_ on December 19, 2006 at 1:43 AM | link to this | reply

I must say that I also disagree with Parnell. A 'witchhunt mentality' seeks to isolate and blame named persons in full view of society. I haven't done that and neither have you. I've named my names to Blogit, as our policy here allows for and encourages, but have specifically not accused anyone as a culprit in open blogging. What I have done is to remind some bloggers of behaviour which I find detrimental to the site, but those criticisms are to do with behaviour, not scapegoating blame.

To prejudge the reason why activity has dropped off is erroneous too. My activity, for instance, has dropped off dramatically, but not for the reason stated by Parnell. For him to name you and I as the witchhunters is in fact a witchhunt all of its own which is being perpetuated by others around the site.

posted by _dave_says_ack_ on December 19, 2006 at 1:42 AM | link to this | reply

Dave I support what you say

posted by Chilitree on December 19, 2006 at 1:34 AM | link to this | reply

Blogflogger, I have felt and do still feel the same anger as you. I do agree that some bloggers acted in the full knowledge of Blanche's condition when they goaded her, not just on her final weekend here, but in the many months that led up to it. I have made my complaints to Blogit and I hope that you will be doing so also. But I also blame myself to a certain extent. I should have complained a long time ago, then perhaps we all would have been able to protect Blanche. Blanche is a wonderful person and a great writer and so many of us are missing her deeply. When she is well again and if she decides she wants to, I'd love to have her back here, either as herself or under a new name. I'm waiting to see what she wants, but I'd make a strong appeal to Blogit for her reinstatement, which is allowed for under their policies.

You're right, it was an 'absolutely loathsome episode'. One small good thing to arise, and your notes help here, is that many of us now have a much clearer understanding of bipolar illness. I hope to keep this issue alive, not to disrupt Blogit, but with the intention that nothing like it should ever be able to happen again on this site.

Thankyou for your post on this. You have my full support.

posted by _dave_says_ack_ on December 19, 2006 at 1:32 AM | link to this | reply

Blanche is my friend

Not was my friend but IS my friend. With that said even being aware of her condition I was blindsided by what occured. It brought back many demons for myself and I am sure some others; I had to simply remove myself from the situation for my own well being and in the end all I could do was find myself feeling helpless to do anything because in all honesty, I simply do not know how to help with something of the sort.

Blanche is a good and loving person and I really doubt that she would enjoy being the subject of so many posts even if they are well intended. it hurts me to see this go on and on instead of simply letting her heal in peace as we move on.  I have been in touch with Blanche and I don't get the feeling that she really wants to come back here.  Let's face it this place gives new meaning to dysfunction.

.dave is doing the most beneficial thing I can see, he is passing good wishes to Blanche and anyone who thinks that is a problem...oh well.

Most of us here have our own issues and are not qualified to help anyone else and I highly doubt Blanche expects that of any of us.  That just isn't her style.  She is a good person with a very loving heart, she deserves better than being Made the topic of everyone's anger and frustration is not the way to help her. 

 

posted by bel_1965 on December 18, 2006 at 10:20 PM | link to this | reply

I am sorry to hear about Blanche. She and I had a few lengthy discussions.

I never knew.  I didn't witness the breakdown, either, and am rather glad that I missed it. 

posted by saul_relative on December 18, 2006 at 10:01 PM | link to this | reply

About Blanche

I didn't know about Blanche's condition.  The truth is I didn't pay to get on this blog place to do adult daycare.  I don't think I wrote anything, other than some humorous comebacks to what she wrote, that would have contributed to your post but this over sensitivity is way out of line.  It is no one's job on Blogit to diagnose another writer's lack of mental health.  We do have to restrain our writing from personal attacks, slander if you will, including the slander that writers have delibrately teased a poor woman into a breakdown.

posted by LeRoyCoyote on December 18, 2006 at 9:52 PM | link to this | reply

blogflogger you are correct when stating that the powers that be

(government, pharmecuedical companies, lobbiests, etc) are very negligent in their potential for helping those with mental illness.  In my investigations of attempting to solve my own mental disorder I have discovered that there are several drugs with amazing potential to help people that are kept from us as a whole for very unwholesome reasons. 

The way the mechanisms of society deal with mental illness is an atrocity and a sad commentary on humanity and civilization.

Blanche was always good to me.  Perhaps she recognized a kindred one... I was familiar with her to a certain degree but I did not know she was ill till the end. 

 

posted by mysteria on December 18, 2006 at 9:47 AM | link to this | reply

Parnell - The people this post was targeting, who attacked her needlessly..

... and over-reacted to her wild comments, that KNEW her behavior was way out of character, know to whom I was speaking (writing).

My 3 seconds comment referred to a Google search to explain erratic behavior. I haven’t been blogging lately, but I would characterize her past comments as generally moderate, and pithy if political. Like most on Blogit she has tangled with a few bloggers in the past. I think she may have been on a slow burn toward this crash.

As for “most people … showed restraint…? I read comment after comment either to her or ABOUT her, which is incredibly rude, and would upset any of us. I am not pious, I was disgusted with what I saw as horrific behavior. The pious ones are those who have been around Blogit forever, knew Blanche’s writing and attitudes, and knew they were involved in mob-mentality and overreaction.

As far as a witch hunt, don’t be so dramatic and paranoid. I read what I read, and reacted accordingly.

“Blogit is wounded at the moment”? I think I’ll save my concern for her.

posted by blogflogger on December 18, 2006 at 7:29 AM | link to this | reply

Scoop - I beg to differ.

"It was a sad ending but no one brought Blanche down, she did it on her own." No Scoop, her illness brought her down, and a health care system that can't manage to provide adequate mental health care and appropriate prescription drugs to care for the mentally ill of our country.

posted by blogflogger on December 18, 2006 at 6:25 AM | link to this | reply

Blogflogger, Parnell is 100% correct on this

Blanche had commented on my posts about Iraq, President Bush and politics in general for a long time and seemed rational to me. I liked her but never knew of her illness and didn't sense anything until she started to unravel. It was a sad ending but no one brought Blanche down, she did it on her own.

posted by scoop on December 18, 2006 at 5:43 AM | link to this | reply

Blogflogger

You couldn't be more wrong about this.

It's just not true that anyone who had read Blanche for 'three seconds' knew about her mental illness. Like many bloggers, I've only been around here for a few months and had absolutely no idea - although, I had observed that she was normally a very hurtful and personally aggressive writer. For many of us the first clear indication that Blanche was sick - rather than incredibly abusive - was when she began to disintegrate with a series of comments that could only come from an ill person.

Like most people on the site I began to see the meltdown and backed off. The vast, vast majority of people on Blogit did the same thing. There may have been a few button-pushers, making needless threats to call the CIA and that sort of rubbish, but most people grasped what was happening and showed a remarkable degree of restraint. You have piously alleged that everyone on the site should feel ashamed and guilty, and in doing so you have done a great disservice to the people that write on here every day.

The reality is that Blogit is wounded at the moment. The amount of traffic on the site in the last few days has dropped by more than half. I don't believe this is because of the episode with Blanche directly, but because of the witchhunt mentality being brought to the site by people such as yourself and Dave. People work hard all day, and then we spend some of our hard earned cash on this site to improve our writing skills, and perhaps open our minds up to other people's opinions. We don't spend our money to be abused by anybody regardless of their mental state, or to be told by pious bloggers that we are responsible for the health of their friends regardless of the fact that we didn't know them personally - or even that they were sick.

All your blame-driven, wrong-headed posturing on this particular issue is doing, is to stoke the fires of conflict on Blogit.

And no doubt win you a few clicks...

posted by Antipodean on December 18, 2006 at 12:11 AM | link to this | reply

blogflogger

Yes, it was deeply shocking and I worried too about the lifeline. I only hope that other   outlets can be found that may have fewer of the unhealthy competitive aspects as here.

 

  It will never happen I imagine but one of the ideas I raised last week for discussion  was a suspension system for when there is a hint of a problem like this. It would be better to see the odd suspension that seemed a little heavy than ever to see something like this unfold again.

posted by Azur on December 17, 2006 at 10:58 PM | link to this | reply