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Pat---He was a teenager (me). Teenagers are more focused on what they

want than what is best or most logical.

posted by Jazwolf on November 28, 2006 at 6:43 AM | link to this | reply

The impulse to touch the wild thing

and the impulse to rescue something, to fix a mistake -- it is all plausible.  I am a bit concerned about your teen ager's idea of damage control.  The idea of a hawk in a laundry basket escaping into the back seat of a car, links in my mind to the sound of a vehicle crashing head-on into a tree.  Why didn't your protagonist just open the car door and let the creature live its own life?  :)

posted by Pat_B on November 28, 2006 at 6:29 AM | link to this | reply

Empathy would be more the proper word, Jazwolf,

Every person is different, and it sounds like the bicycle accident and head injury may have affected her quite a lot.  As I said, I am bipolar, so I have been through that myself.  I have to clean out the massive amounts of drugs in my bathroom, the ones I no longer need, am on something else, a much lighter doseage.

But unless someone has been on Seroquel, Depakote, Tegretol, lithium, Paxil, Prolixin, you don't know how overwhelming it is. 1600 mg of Depakote would stop a racehorse in its tracks.

I would say, though, that you've suffered enough, racked enough guilt over this. She did what she did, and she should be held accountable for it, as understandable as it is. As I said, misusing you, and taking advantage of your trust in that way is inexcusable, and I cannot see myself ever doing that to anyone, bipolar or no.

Whatever made her do that, I have no idea, but you can't let her illness let her completelyy off the hook. I believe in personal responsibility mitigated with compassion.  I feel terrible for you both, but for you because you tried to help, you had feelings for her, and that was taken advantage of, and that is just not right. 

posted by Blanche. on November 25, 2006 at 8:08 AM | link to this | reply

Blanche--- Thanks for your compassion and sympathy. Don't want to get

too much in her personal history. But she long had mental problems that required medication and, then, she had a terrible head injury from a bicycle accident (or so she told me) that required additional chemicals, which meant piling anti-convulsives onto anti-depressants. Sometimes, she would become so instantly debilitated that she had to stop whatever she was trying to do, curl up into the fetal position, and close her eyes for awhile. Now add in the amorality and thievery. I'm still counting my blessings that I escaped with no more than a few material losses. And I still feel so sorry for her and the mental torment that she endures daily.

posted by Jazwolf on November 25, 2006 at 7:57 AM | link to this | reply

Jazwolf,

Playing with the chronology in narrative, rather than making it linear, can intrigue the reader and evoke curiosity and emotions, sort of like life.   I like PatB's techniques, for example, of intertwining narratives, and moving back and forth, rather than the simple A to Z re-telling.

Although, to be perfectly honest, until I read this post I hadn't given much thought; thanks for bringing it to my conscious attention.  I suppose this could work as well in non-fiction magazine articles as it could in fiction, don't you think?

Re: your note on the other blog about your experience on Eharmony: as I said, you're not the first, probably won't be the last, but that was a particuarly sad story.  If she was not on medication, she may well have been delusional, but on the other hand, I can tell you from personal experience, that that is no excuse:  if somone is not actively delusional at the time they are as morally culpable as anyone.

It's like Mel Gibson making racist statements and then trying to pass it off as t he alcohol talking: no, it doesn't work that way.  The alcohol loossens inhibitions but it doesn't put words in your mouth.  Neither does being bipolar give somone a free pass to be amoral, although, at times cannot be held fully accountable or responsible, if in the middle of a delusion at that time.  Still, that is cold comfort and a bitter pill for you to swallow, I'm sure, and I feel bad for you. That's just wrong. 

posted by Blanche. on November 25, 2006 at 7:30 AM | link to this | reply

Whacky---Yes, I knew John well. We often discussed writing over a mug

of mead.

posted by Jazwolf on November 25, 2006 at 7:09 AM | link to this | reply

Hey! I hear the John Milton did the same thing with "Paradise Lost."

So you are in good company.

posted by Whacky on November 24, 2006 at 10:34 PM | link to this | reply

Nice story .

posted by afzal50 on November 24, 2006 at 6:13 AM | link to this | reply

Lovely story, you got me squawking with delight...

Poor bird, though. Is there a moral to this story? Technical angle put aside. I am facetious and half serious here. It reminds me of  Aesop's Fables. (spelling not guaranteed). 

posted by marieclaire66 on November 23, 2006 at 10:56 PM | link to this | reply