Go to Dave's Poetic Meanderings
- Add a comment
- Go to A BRAND NEW START.... A girl came to me in tears, having just lost
pretty.
posted by
Root05
on August 22, 2006 at 9:51 AM
| link to this | reply
Whoo-Hoo! Twice the Fun, 8-ball!
One compliment good, two compliments better! Even if they are the same one! Thanks!
posted by
swftfox
on June 21, 2006 at 6:14 AM
| link to this | reply
Sorry
About the double comment. My computer is slow so I thought I didn't click on the Add Comment when I did so you get two comments today plus this one.
posted by
8-ball
on June 21, 2006 at 6:08 AM
| link to this | reply
Good post
I love your poems they are true to the heart.
posted by
8-ball
on June 21, 2006 at 6:06 AM
| link to this | reply
Good post
I love your poems they are true to the heart.
posted by
8-ball
on June 21, 2006 at 6:06 AM
| link to this | reply
Well, Ypunday, it's like this.....
It seems like my rhyming poetry falls into a cadence consisting of 15-16 syllables,so if altered the poem would not read nearly as smoothly. Also, it rather irks me to see so much of this "poetry" that doesn't rhyme, i.e. prose where there is no cadence, no grammar and consequently no meaning that is remotely understandable. I think I'll leave this alone. I always appreciate hearing other opinions though. (I don't believe much of Karma either, but lately I sure been thinking about it! My life sucks.)
posted by
swftfox
on June 20, 2006 at 5:35 PM
| link to this | reply
Thanks for your generosity
Every random act of kindness adds to the good karma of our species! I believe that even if I do not believe in the theories of Hindu Karma.
Suggestion: Try shortening the lines to about ten syllables per line. It may read smoother. The ideas and tone are fine; just in case you would like to clip the prosiness (is that a word?). Shalom. YPUN
posted by
ILLUMINATI8
on June 20, 2006 at 4:42 PM
| link to this | reply
Let's hope the poem did the trick.
and that your generosity paid off.
posted by
marieclaire66
on June 20, 2006 at 12:18 AM
| link to this | reply