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Every agony is sweet....

when you lose your spouse and it is almost better to feel the pain than to feel nothing. Even now, in the midst of what I can only call the most exhilarating relationship you can imagine, I still feel the pain. It is like a dull ache. Some days it is intense and I hurt so bad that I don't want to pick my head up off the pillow and then there are days like today when every memory is sweet and the only tears are happy ones. Its always going to be like this. I could not forget if I tried, even if I wanted to... and I don't. So I remember because my soul demands that I do and I live because my heart did not stop beating when he died. And along the way I have ganered wissom I do not want and love that I did not realize would ever exist for me again. The pain is both sweet and unbearable. That's life. 

Mike's Goddess

posted by mikes_goddess on April 5, 2006 at 5:47 PM | link to this | reply

Ohhh.
You brought tears to my eyes, Goddess.  Very touching and from the soul.  Thank you for sharing that exquisite pain.  I hope it helped. 

posted by Witchflower on April 5, 2006 at 3:27 PM | link to this | reply