Go to Poetry: Gravely Poetic
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- Go to Help...I think this poem needs a different ending!!!!!! Any suggestions?
Mia-ella DON`T TOUCH IT!!! it`s perfect as it is
you journey easily there, u feel all of what is happening, but you do escape, FANTASTIC!! xxx
posted by
mcbreeze
on August 14, 2005 at 11:42 AM
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Wow, MiaElla. There, I said it for you. Very graphic. Makes me not want to be in that place and then you make me feel good with the ending.
posted by
TAPS.
on August 12, 2005 at 8:26 PM
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mia
the whole poem made me go wow girlfriend.
posted by
MysticGmekeepr
on August 12, 2005 at 8:16 PM
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mia
i don't know honey, thats pretty awesome as it is...play with it if you feel like it, but it "feels" right as it is.
posted by
MysticGmekeepr
on August 12, 2005 at 8:15 PM
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The way you wrote it, is the way it should be!
That was a wonderful poem befitting a wonderful writer!
posted by
SomeoneElse
on August 12, 2005 at 2:43 PM
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mia ella
Can't win 'em all gal
posted by
ariel70
on August 12, 2005 at 1:03 PM
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ariel70
I guess I was looking for an ending that makes the reader go "wow!"
posted by
MiaElla
on August 12, 2005 at 12:58 PM
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mia ella
Your ending looks fine to me
posted by
ariel70
on August 12, 2005 at 12:32 PM
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MiaElla --thanks, i could say the same about u.
posted by
scriber
on August 12, 2005 at 12:30 PM
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scriber
That in itself sounds like a poem...you have a beautiful way with words.
posted by
MiaElla
on August 12, 2005 at 12:20 PM
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the last few lines
I steel myself
to flight as a light ahead
beckons to me hope;
I enter the night.
----or something.
posted by
scriber
on August 12, 2005 at 12:19 PM
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