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Chrissy, I'm still waiting to see who
will be chosen to be "the main bitch." As you can see, I did not provide any submission due to the fact that you're already my bitch. (Or is it the other way around?) Me gets confwused now and then.
posted by
SpitFire70
on March 11, 2005 at 10:46 PM
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Well, I happen to know just how much Chris lusts after Margaret...
And I know what he wants her to do to him. Hell, who wouldn't?
Oh, he'll be my bitch. Yes-oh-yes.
posted by
mark2556
on March 9, 2005 at 12:54 PM
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Mark I look a whole hell of a lot better than Maggie and I never want to get married again NEVER. just in it for a houseboy hotter than the current
posted by
the-loanlady
on March 9, 2005 at 12:42 PM
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Unlimited cash?!?
Damn you, Loanlady! Wanna bring out the big guns, eh?
Unlimited Margaret Thatcher
Oh, that's right.....
posted by
mark2556
on March 9, 2005 at 5:45 AM
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Unlimited cash.
posted by
the-loanlady
on March 8, 2005 at 2:06 PM
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I Already...
...have a bitch.
She's called Penny. She's nearly 14 years old, chocolate and white, and a Welsh springer spaniel.
Very sweet.
How could you possibly replace her?
D
posted by
DamonLeigh
on March 6, 2005 at 4:44 AM
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HAWAII and SNOT
posted by
Jemmie211
on March 6, 2005 at 4:40 AM
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christopher:
look, i think i'm the obvious choice here so i'm not even going to put forth any reasons. i'm the fucking devil, baby. and i'm sufficiently wonky enough to make it quite nice for you to be my bitch, if you play your cards right. 
besides, your mom's already my bitch. makes sense it should become a family tradition. i've already sent an email to your grandmother about joining up. but you would be the head bitch, i assure you.
posted by
Rupert_Bottom_Paddler
on March 4, 2005 at 8:00 AM
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I won't cook for you at all.
But I WILL cover you in snot. And various other semi-viscous fluids. Plus, you'd also get to be bitch for our groundskeeping superintendent ~
Your only task is to help her zip up. What she does with you prior to that is confidential.
Come be our bitch.
posted by
mark2556
on March 3, 2005 at 6:14 AM
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I deserve to be your bitch!
You can come live with me in
Hawaii, and I'll cook for you all the time! And I promise I won't cover you in
snot!
posted by
Jemmie211
on March 2, 2005 at 6:16 PM
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well, you knew my entry was coming...and why should you be my
bitch? Because for 1. I'll be devestated if you don't pick me, and I'll cry myself to sleep everynight if you don't 2. the person you DO choose, I will have to plot a horrible revenge for them 3. I'll be your bitch next month 4. we are angry soulmates 5. Mark would want it that way and the last reason in a pathetic display of a lovesick blogger, I'll send you a bunch of nudie pictures...
posted by
Kiddo75
on March 2, 2005 at 12:07 PM
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What? You have to have sex to win this? Ewww.
posted by
Ariala
on March 2, 2005 at 6:57 AM
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Mark...
ah yes... I forgot about the twins. Which is not an easy thing to do either! Thanks for the reminder.
posted by
RedHeadedGypsy
on March 2, 2005 at 6:55 AM
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Gypsy ~ Lard and midgets are pretty formidable assets...
...and I'm certainly glad to have them, but you have something that I don't have. Or Ariala.
Hooters.
No guy will ever pass them up. Damn you!
posted by
mark2556
on March 2, 2005 at 6:53 AM
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Chris...
I have all sorts of reasons I deserve having a bitch, but for some reason I don't think any of them are twisted enough. How can I compete with Mark? He has lard, anal eze and midgets. Ariala woos you with her high status and ability to step on you. Besides, the worse I'd do to my bitch is make him have sex with me as often as he could get it up and the rest of the time he could watch tv and eat bonbons. Seems tame by comparison.
posted by
RedHeadedGypsy
on March 2, 2005 at 6:49 AM
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Chris, I know how much you like role playing...
posted by
Ariala
on March 2, 2005 at 5:53 AM
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I thought Ariala was the daddy ~
Damn, this incest business is confusing.
posted by
mark2556
on March 2, 2005 at 5:52 AM
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chris2303
......and it wasn't a contract!
posted by
_Symphony_
on March 2, 2005 at 5:43 AM
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mark2556
So now you tell me! a little late don't you think!.....and to think I have been sleeping with it under my pillow for days and blamed the dog for such a horrid smell.....
posted by
_Symphony_
on March 2, 2005 at 5:40 AM
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Ariala
How can I be your bitch when I'm already yo daddy?
posted by
chris2303
on March 2, 2005 at 5:39 AM
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SYMPHONY
Er, that wasn't snot...
posted by
chris2303
on March 2, 2005 at 5:39 AM
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mark
Well it would make sense, but on the other hand I'm not sure I could trust you to abstain from owning other bitches, and you know how jealous I am, especially when it comes to natural animal lards and such like. Ooh that reminds me, must phone my mother. Her legs need cleaning again.
posted by
chris2303
on March 2, 2005 at 5:38 AM
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Chrissy, this is good news indeed...I don't want one, I already have
a dozen, but if rejection works for you then maybe you'll still want to be mine. I'm also good at old fashion, uncompromised bitch slapping.
posted by
Ariala
on March 2, 2005 at 5:33 AM
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Symphony ~
Important Safety Tip: Never accept a tissue/paper towel/handerchief from Chris. There's a reason it smells like shit, you know.
posted by
mark2556
on March 2, 2005 at 5:29 AM
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so the tissue, that you wiped your snot away with, and gave to me!!!!!
was not a contract?......Damn....
posted by
_Symphony_
on March 2, 2005 at 5:10 AM
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I want you to be my bitch because ~
I think it's gonna take a real man to satisfy me, but I don't wanna go homo. So, you're it, bitch.
posted by
mark2556
on March 2, 2005 at 5:10 AM
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Cynthia
Here's the direct link...
posted by
chris2303
on March 2, 2005 at 5:07 AM
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Cynthia
Hey, I'd make a good bitch for you. In fact, if you click on my NUMBER ONE BLOG (please excuse the content) and go to the first ever post, you will find I have already been arse kissing you, and thoroughly deserved it is, too.
posted by
chris2303
on March 2, 2005 at 5:06 AM
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SYMPHONY
Well that's true, but I never signed a contract
posted by
chris2303
on March 2, 2005 at 5:04 AM
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Chris, you know I'm
a great writer but I don't get my share of all the good stuff like being #1 and all that so I want to
sign up now. Get your arse down to my post and click away. leave me a smiley face PLEASE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
posted by
Cynthia
on March 2, 2005 at 4:49 AM
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Because your my bitch already........
posted by
_Symphony_
on March 2, 2005 at 4:47 AM
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