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Beach, Actually I had incorporated your suggestions before I jettisoned the poor spoons and got into the chocolate...but as I said in the critique blog, perhaps I'll now feel inspired to write another poem about spooning!!
posted by
Julia.
on January 2, 2005 at 5:42 PM
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Well no Quriky but mine wasn't that good either - lol
and now you've lost the spoons. I liked the spoons
posted by
beachbelle
on January 2, 2005 at 5:38 PM
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Beachbelle,
See--that wasn't so hard, was it?? 
Thanks!
posted by
Julia.
on January 1, 2005 at 5:54 PM
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Ariala,
thanks again.
posted by
Julia.
on January 1, 2005 at 5:50 PM
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Quirky-Alone
As I stated I am ill-qualified to make criticisms but since you sought it (avidly - lol) here goes. I like the way you mix something so domestic with love - true love is often all about the domestic things.
I would lose the "so" in the third line.
I would also consider transposing these two lines
I feel safe, warm and comforted.
Cradled in your strong arms.
I don't know is this is a cliche or not - but perhaps you could lose one an "I" at the start of one of the lines and put "May the" or something else.
posted by
beachbelle
on January 1, 2005 at 1:12 PM
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Quirky, I've reviewed your poem per your request.
Link 
posted by
Ariala
on January 1, 2005 at 1:08 PM
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Katray,
how nice...thank you!
posted by
Julia.
on January 1, 2005 at 1:05 PM
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Very embracing and warm Quirky! Love it.
posted by
Katray2
on January 1, 2005 at 12:53 PM
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Klara,
Wow, thanks a lot for that lovely compliment! Inspiration does help to evoke emotion, doesn't it?
posted by
Julia.
on January 1, 2005 at 11:11 AM
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An incredibly romantic, lovingly written poem Quirks.
Anyone reading this can tell it came straight from the heart and is inspired by someone very special to you. A poem I would deem publishable indeed!
posted by
KlaraRoberts
on January 1, 2005 at 10:42 AM
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Alf,
Thank you for that poetically beautiful comment and comparison!
posted by
Julia.
on January 1, 2005 at 10:05 AM
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beezus,
If I answered that, then every nosy blogger would want to know...is it a blogger, huh, is it? Well, let's just say I was inspired to write this poem by a real person and leave it at that!
posted by
Julia.
on January 1, 2005 at 10:04 AM
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electric, thanks...and lol.
Well, I guess there are worse things than to be thought of during breakfast! Thanks again!
posted by
Julia.
on January 1, 2005 at 9:38 AM
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are you
in love ? :)
posted by
beezus
on December 31, 2004 at 8:22 PM
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quirky..........a very.....................................................
loving romantic poem ..........i will never look at a spoon the same way again and i will think of you while i eat my breakfast.......heheheeee.........lol........
happy new year..........
posted by
electric_light_ambition
on December 31, 2004 at 7:57 PM
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Quirky...
This poem was rather like a painting, in that it creates images and sensations in the mind. Great Job!
posted by
A_Norseman
on December 31, 2004 at 4:07 PM
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Brimstone,
Thank you for the "wow" and for your lovely words. Happy New Year to you!
posted by
Julia.
on December 31, 2004 at 3:44 PM
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Wow!
Such pretty words with so much passion - I love it!
Hope the new year is good to you...
posted by
bwFrampton
on December 31, 2004 at 12:17 PM
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Symphony,
thanks for reading my poem(s), and happy new year to you, too!
posted by
Julia.
on December 31, 2004 at 11:10 AM
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aaahhh that sound so beautiful and warm!
H
appy New Year
posted by
_Symphony_
on December 31, 2004 at 11:02 AM
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