http://www.blogit.com/Blogs/Blog.aspx/LUBY123/CONTINUING STORY OF LUBY123 AND HER NEED TO UNDERSTAND AND FIND THE MIDDLE OF HER RELATIONSHIPS(A ROMANTIC OR PASSIONATE ATTACHMENT)hourly12000-01-01T12:00+00:00http://www.blogit.com/Blogs/Blog.aspx/LUBY123/618171Lane was full of questions about player as she calls him. So, did you hear from player?Why didn't he call or let you know he was going out of town? Lane player as you call him does just what ever he chooses and i don't know why. Yes, i spoke to him before i left and he did not explain where he...http://www.blogit.com/Blogs/Blog.aspx/LUBY123/617859I called Lane and Rita to let them know i was leaving to pick them up.I was excited about this trip not only because it would put some distance between me and my addiction. Also i needed to finish my business with Leon and dissolving our marriage. Rita called me in the car. What's up girl i am on...http://www.blogit.com/Blogs/Blog.aspx/LUBY123/617582As i packed for my trip. I felt a sadness in my soul like i had never felt before. I was hurt and relieved at the same time. Hurt because he had not called or told me he was leaving. Relieved because he called when he came back so i was still a part of his life as it was. I had made up my mind i...http://www.blogit.com/Blogs/Blog.aspx/LUBY123/617228I will admit that i wanted to see my addiction. I had missed him and wanted to know why he had not called me or even told me he was going on vacation. I was very upset with him but i did not let him know. Why? couldn't i show my angry, hurt or resentment toward him. Always got to be the happy...http://www.blogit.com/Blogs/Blog.aspx/LUBY123/616993I NOW REALIZE THAT MY THEORY THAT MEN LIVE IN THE MOMENT WOMEN LIVE IN THE FUTURE TAKE CARE OF HIS MOMENT HE WILL TAKE CARE OF YOUR FUTURE IS TOO TRUE. For sure my addiction lives in the moment and expects me to take care of it when the need arrives. Do i live in the future? Should i stop wanting...http://www.blogit.com/Blogs/Blog.aspx/LUBY123/616954The week went by slowly by hump day i was certain i had been dumped. I was angry and mad at myself. I had decided that i would go down to visit mama's grave it was close to Mother's Day next week. I knew he would be back on Saturday and i did not want to be available. I asked Rita if she wanted...http://www.blogit.com/Blogs/Blog.aspx/LUBY123/616670It has been week i have not got a phone call not even a text message. Not that he would text me anyway. I had to avoid all the questions from the ladies on last evening when we went out to dinner. So Lane asked heard from player? Rita as usual was down on player i told you so going strong. So i...http://www.blogit.com/Blogs/Blog.aspx/LUBY123/616522On the way home i decided that i was not going to let this upset me. In reality i was feeling so used and hurt. We had just spent last night together i had told him I Love him. Is that why he acted scared when i said I Love you. Did he know he was leaving? Of course he did i stopped the car i...http://www.blogit.com/Blogs/Blog.aspx/LUBY123/616005I was a little concerned that my addiction was uneasy with me telling him I love you. Did he think our relationship (a romantic or passionate attachment) would always remain the same. Was i just a drive by hitting when the need arrived I get such mixed emotions from this man. One week he is...http://www.blogit.com/Blogs/Blog.aspx/LUBY123/615140I dressed for work and was feeling very good. Even though when i told him "I Love You" he was uncomfortable. Why? am i suppose to not love him. The phone rang it was Rita. Hey, girl you doing ok? You seemed a little tight last time we talked. I'm find why hell i'm better than find. Oh that must...