Thursday, October 15, 2009
Exert From The Journey Home
Exert from "The Journey Home." The above path taken by those who are dying is also taken by their family and friends who loved them. As you watch your loved one die, a part of you dies also. You will experience the same stages of grief because they are sick and they are not getting well. The anger...
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Sunday, October 11, 2009
A Rough Weekend
It has been a rough weekend. My adrenal rush is over and on Wednesday I crashed physically with a Fibro flare with hypoglycemia, migraine, trigger points, insomnia, and increased pain. I just went to bed and started sitting in my sauna daily and meditation and the jacuzzi. I managed to go out to eat...
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Monday, October 5, 2009
It's Just a Bag
Yesterday, Brooke and Scott went with me to gather flowers from Richard's grave so I can dry them and put them in the little silver urn the cemetery provided as a keepsake. Richard's other nephew had not been able to come since he is in the service and he had sent a beautiful rose, carnation and...
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Friday, October 2, 2009
A Wonderful Celebration of Life
Today we Celebrated Richard's life. It was a wonderful service and he would (did) love it. I'm sure he was present. We all had wonderful stories to tell. I rode with my son Blake and after the service, we were on the way to the cemetary and Blake said to me that he had really missed out on really...
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Sunday, September 27, 2009
My Caregiver Days are Almost Done
see living with Alzhiemer's
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Friday, September 25, 2009
New Challenges to Face
Today we prepared for Richard's birthday on Sunday. I ordered your cake with the red roses he wanted. By all the standards we can go at this time, I have to say we had a good day. The nurse came for a visit and your oxgen level was down to 84%. He still has no air exchange in his lower lobes. The...
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Wednesday, September 23, 2009
Accepting Death While Facing My Fear
My greatest fear during this journey Richard and I have traveled is that he would forget who I am and become angry, noncooperative or combative. As we travel closer to the end, he is forgetting me more and more. The other day he was so angry that I "a stranger" tried to kiss him and give him his...
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Sunday, September 13, 2009
Losing Strength to Carry On
I'm trying to hard to care for Richard and keep him at home. Today was so tiring doing laundry and bathing Richard by myself and having to dig out and impaction since he hadn't had a BM since Thursday. He is not able to help with turning or holding himself in position so I have to turn and hold and...
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Sunday, September 6, 2009
Helpless Suffering
Helplessness is the worst of the suffering when watching your husband die. Guilt quickly follows as you pray for relief of his suffering and you reassure him that all has been taken care of and that he can go to the Light when he sees it knowing he has taken care of all his worldly tasks. Even...
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Monday, August 24, 2009
No Words
There are no words to express my feelings these days. I exist from day to day and night to night. My days I fill with sewing, painting, or sleeping. All activities are simple and can be done without a lot of organized thoughts. Reading is difficult to impossible. I can accomplish certain tasks but...
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