Thursday, March 16, 2006Knowing Where The Racial Boundaries AreMy two boys were sitting around the dinner table the other night calling each other "cracker". As with most things these days, it began to get a little out of hand, when the smallest, 11, yells at the oldest, 12, "Stop calling me a cracker. It's a racial slur." Ever the reluctant umpire, I stepped... Sign in to see full entry.Tuesday, March 14, 2006Milosevic's Death The Heart Of IronyWhen the autopsy ordered by the United Nations War Crimes Tribunal resulted in the finding that the Butcher of the Balkans, former Serbian dictator Milosevic, had died of a massive heart attack, doctors and officials alike were astounded. They were shocked he actually had one. Sign in to see full entry.Monday, March 13, 2006Hallelujah!! Beer From The Kitchen Tap!!!An apartment in Norway was recently hooked into the beer supply of a downstairs pub. To the bar patrons' horror, water flowed from the bar's taps. The local beer distributor helped reconnect the lines by phone. After inspecting the lines, it was conceded that the lines were close in proximity, but... Sign in to see full entry.Sunday, March 12, 2006What Constitutes 'Private Parts'It has come to my attention that the Arizona Supreme Court has decided that 'female breasts' do not constitute 'private parts' as dictated by state law. Well, since they're public parts, I guess we'll be seeing more breasts in Phoenix and Flagstaff. Nothing wrong with that. Local Hooters restaurants... Sign in to see full entry.Friday, March 10, 2006Smoke 'Em If You Got 'EmAmerica's Attorneys Generals have reported that the number of cigarettes sold in the United States fell to a 55-year low this past year. A theory: The explosive increase in oral sex among teenagers is directly related to the decrease in cigarette sales, especially among young women. At the... Sign in to see full entry.Sunday, February 26, 2006Don Knotts, One of America's Acting Icons, DiesIt was with great sadness that I noted the passing of one of my childhood icons, a familiar face that I grew up with, a man whose portrayal of a good-hearted, bumbling small-town deputy filled many hours of my life with a smile. And to think I paid back the memories of such joy with tears... Sign in to see full entry.Saturday, February 25, 2006Winter Olympics Biting Ratings DustWell, it's official -- American Idol stomped the hell out of the Olympics. It's ratings were twice that of the Torino Olympiad. Adding a black guy didn't even help the ratings. Sometimes novelties don't work as selling points. Maybe if they had someone like Simon Cowell on the judging panel for the... Sign in to see full entry.Sunday, February 19, 2006Cartoon Character AssassinationI thought about collecting symbolicly. I would let my burly stick-figure assassin take out the evil libertarian cartoonist by employing a six-shooter eraser. Hmmm. Maybe that Muslim cleric could sketch me my reward. And then visit my buddy, hangman. Sign in to see full entry.Thursday, February 16, 2006Easily, The Best Line In Any Story On The Internet...I know, I know. How could I know that, given that there are so many stories to peruse on the net? I'm just guessing, but, well, you be the jury: In an article in USAToday entitled, "New York Plans to Offer Official City Condom", this sentence appears near the end: "The Catholic League, a lay... Sign in to see full entry.Sunday, February 12, 2006Artist Exhibits Innermost SelfIt has been said that all art portrays a part of the particular artist's innermost self, but artist Phillip Warnell took this axiom to its literal limits by swallowing a microscopic endoscope and allowing the camera to project its journey to an audience. Talk about taking performance art a little... Sign in to see full entry. |