Saturday, September 22, 2007
Why I Want to be Like Sally and NOT Clarissa Jo...By, Barbara Ann
Dear Sally, I hope you are feeling a lot better today. I am sorry you had to be sick and go to the hospital. I have never been in a hospital, but I bet you did not like it at all. I am glad you are home now. I don't know where you live so I can't send you any flowers, but if I could I would send you...
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Friday, September 21, 2007
THE MAGNOLIAS DEDICATE THIS POST TO THEIR DEAR FRIEND OFFY...
BARBARA ANN a.k.a. BARBED WIRE, BELLE, and CLARISSA JO: WE LOVE YOU SALLY. PLEASE GET WELL SOON! What started off as a calm, quiet peaceful mornin' has deteriorated into chaos; I suppose you have figured out by the tone in my voice that I am not the picture of serenity I was earlier this morning,...
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Sunday, February 4, 2007
NEW WHEELS, ANIMATED PRODUCE, AND A CATFIGHT ON AISLE SEVEN...
The announcement interrupted the continuous loop music the fruit in the produce department likes so much, while the imitation rain shower accompanied by the sound of fake thunder washed over the veggies keeping them crisp...and happy... according to store advertising. Yeah..right! There are banners...
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Saturday, February 3, 2007
BELLE, SHE'S GOIN' TO DO IT. SHE'S REALLY GOIN' TO DO IT! HOLD ON , BELLE!
I never in my wildest imagination thought Barbed would be scared of anything...other than spiders, that is! "...but Dr. Stein, if you wait to give me a handicapped sticker when I need it all the time I won't get one iota of pleasure out of it! If you give it to me now, though, I'll at least get to...
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Monday, July 3, 2006
THE MAGNOLIAS ARE BACK...AND BARBED HASN'T CHANGED ONE IOTA!
All Right, Clarissa Jo! This is enough...I've had it! I just can't stand all the sighin' and cryin' and carryin' on you're doin'... you're just wanderin' around like you're in some kind of a daze, and I am goin' to scream if you blow your nose one more time. Geeze Louise, everybody's Daddy gets...
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Thursday, October 27, 2005
BELLE IS LATE! ONE OF MANY SURPRISES TODAY... PART III
Have you ever noticed that when you think you have life figured out, something comes along to let you know how little you really know? Well, that's how I felt this evening while I was fixin' supper... "I'm ready to talk now, Clarissa Jo..." "Belle? It's almost suppertime! I was expectin' to see you...
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Wednesday, October 26, 2005
BELLE IS IN A POUT AND WON'T COME OUT...OH! HAPPY DAY...
Well, Belle seems to be in a big pout this mornin' ya'll, so far be it from me to interfere with her needs. I know she thinks she is punishin' me, but it is quite the opposite. I just hope she doesn't figure it out that I'm as happy as a cat sleepin' in a sunny spot on the rug, 'cause Miss Southern...
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Tuesday, October 25, 2005
THE BARBEDWIRE MAGNOLIA WAKES UP...SIGHHHHHHHHHHHH!
CLARISSAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA! CLARISSA JO...WHAT IN THE SAM HILL ARE YOU DOIN'?! HELL'S BELLS, CLARISSA YOU BETTER JUST GET YOUR HEAD OUT OF THAT DREAMWORLD YOU LIVE IN AND LET ME OUT, DAMNIT! I'M GETTIN' SICK AND DAMN TIRED OF TWIDDLIN' MY THUMBS, AND LISTENIN' TO BELLE'S INCESSANT...
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Wednesday, August 24, 2005
"Clarissa...I saw the light from your computer. It's really late for you to be up." "I know, Belle. I took a nap yesterday, and now I can't sleep. What are you doing up so late? This isn't like you either." "Hey! Are we havin' a pajama party? Why didn't y'all call me?" "That's never necessary,...
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Thursday, August 18, 2005
Clarissa Jo! It's Friday...you know, the w-e-e-k-e-n-d? and I WANT A BODY!
"You know, a great body...like I go to the gym and workout all the time...not a freaky body...you know, just well toned. Then I want to go shopping...at Neiman's...and Victoria's Secret...I want a lot of new clothes...and I only want sexy underwear. I want a car...a red Mercedes...convertible. I...
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