Wednesday, March 14, 2007
All You Bought Was A Jug of Cheese Balls??
My daughters are driving me nuts. I gave my 18 year old a membership to one of those big warehouse shopping places (COSTCO) since I got a free one from work and she said that her and her boyfriend were going to check it out. I gave her money and said pick up some good seafood for me. No. Just a big...
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Wednesday, February 21, 2007
"Do You Really Want To Try That On?"
Yes I do. Now open the dressing door now you chubby little cherub so I can see if it fits. My daughter and I went on a shopping spree at the mall and one store had the cutest swimsuits on sale. Now it was 2 degrees outside and I was wearing some coat made out of gortex (just kidding) but almost as...
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Monday, February 5, 2007
The Hair Cottage Women Are Mad At Me Too
Before the New Year, the Hair Cottage Beauticians were ordering takeout on a daily basis from the bar. Now that they are on diets and heard what I said about the owner - they are boycotting us. And Erin the crack head is out to get me I heard too. Kim the owner is a very petite 30ish woman with huge...
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Wednesday, January 31, 2007
Dead Men Walking
As I have stated before, I refuse to join the Dead Poll at the bar. But yesterday the three front-runners were at the bar all day and I felt like I was surrounded by death. First is Terry who was diagnosed with pancreatic cancer and has 2 weeks to live. There he was standing in the kitchen giving me...
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Tuesday, January 30, 2007
Taylor And The Doorknobs
I come from a family of theatrical drama queens and musicians - except for the poised ballet part. No we can't dance so don't ask us. Not very athletic either. But my youngest daughter Taylor is what I call a "dive-bomber" - she dives throughout the house / tramples down the steps / bangs into...
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Friday, January 19, 2007
Beware Of The Pod People
In the immortal words of Boris Badanoff in "Rocky and Bullwinkle" - "this is my latest bad idea". My gambling mooching sister lives in a fantasy world and every few weeks is moving to another state because "this place is shit". Now her and our friend Sue the Slut are moving to Florida and getting...
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Sunday, January 14, 2007
I Refuse To Join The Dead Poll
You would think that I was working in Vegas the way the guys at the bar bet on everything. They even have a poll to see which customer will die first. Topping the list now is Terry who was just diagnosed with pancreatic cancer / second is Irish Bob with the bad liver / and third is Smitty who has...
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Friday, January 12, 2007
Throwing My Sister From The Train
I have to kill my sister - really I do. Somehow, some way - she must die. Last night when she came to the bar and opened her wallet I saw a new crisp $20 bill that was obviously the result of another "shakedown" of our ailing mother. What 50 year old woman mooches $20 off of her mother???? When she...
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Wednesday, January 10, 2007
I Hate Amy Again - The Fued Is Back On
My own personal Rosie O'Donnell insulted me again last night. Now for those of you that read my blog you have heard me refer to Amy as Rosie so don't think I stole it from the headlines!!!! Yesterday's special was stuffed chicken breasts and the last time I made them I used Butcchie's recipe - this...
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Friday, January 5, 2007
I Refuse To Be My Sister's Only Friend
Before Christmas - my gambling mooching sister had a major falling out with her eldest daughter over the "Visit to Virginia" which also included her ex-husband and his new wife. Holidays can be tricky with family members who are divorced but I have no experience (yet) with that. First there was no...
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