Jeff's Write Stuff

By jollyjeff - About Me - E-mail this page - Add to My Favorites - Add to Blog List - See other blogs in On Writing

Saturday, December 4, 2004

Cutting Edge

Another joke about getting old on today's card Outside: Happy Birthday to someone who is on the cutting edge... Inside: Of old age. Sign in to see full entry.

Wednesday, December 1, 2004

Preservatives

Another birthday card kidding the recipient about getting older. Outside: Don't eat any health food on your birthday Inside: At your age, you need all the preservatives you can get. Happy Birthday Sign in to see full entry.

Sunday, November 28, 2004

On purpose

For a change of pace, a congratulations card today Outside: You did that on purpose didn't you? Inside: Congratulations! Now that I look at this one again I wonder if the other way around would work better. Outside: Congratulations! Inside: You did that on purpose didn't you? What do y'all think? Sign in to see full entry.

Saturday, November 27, 2004

$100 bill

Here's a new one a just wrote while munching on a bagel this morning. Outside: I'm giving you a $100 bill for your birthday Inside: It's my electric bill, I'm hoping you can pay it. Happy Birthday Sign in to see full entry.

Wednesday, November 24, 2004

Change of Address

Here's one I wrote yesterday and submitted to Andrews and McMeel. Outside: I'm giving you some change of address forms for your birthday Inside: You're moving into old age. Happy Birthday Sign in to see full entry.

Tuesday, November 23, 2004

Turning Point

Here's one that just got rejected by Gallant Greetings, I'll be sending it elsewhere soon. Outside: Your birthday is a real turning point. Inside: Turning gray, turning wrinkled, turning senile. Happy Birthday. Sign in to see full entry.

Monday, November 22, 2004

Snap Crackle Pop

A new one I just wrote on my lunch hour today. Outside: You know you're getting old when you hear "Snap, crackle, Pop... Inside: And you haven't even opened your cereal yet. Happy Birthday. Sign in to see full entry.

Sunday, November 21, 2004

Current Events

A new one I wrote last week Outside: Another birthday? Why you're not old. Kids today are learning the same things you studied in current events. Inside: Only now it's history. Happy Birthday Sign in to see full entry.

Saturday, November 20, 2004

Baseball Cards

This is a mother's day card I sold to American Greetings a few years ago. Outside: Mom, I know I'll never have enough money to pay you back for all the cooking, cleaning, shopping and driving you've done for me over the years. Inside: On the other hand, if you figure in the value of the baseball... Sign in to see full entry.

Friday, November 19, 2004

Leaves me Breathless

I've never sold a card with a joke about the number of candles on the birthday cake but I keep writing them anyway. Outside: Your birthday leaves me breathless. Inside: Just the thought of trying to blow out all those candles. Happy Birthday. Sign in to see full entry.

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