Wednesday, December 1, 2004
Preservatives
Another birthday card kidding the recipient about getting older. Outside: Don't eat any health food on your birthday Inside: At your age, you need all the preservatives you can get. Happy Birthday
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Sunday, November 28, 2004
On purpose
For a change of pace, a congratulations card today Outside: You did that on purpose didn't you? Inside: Congratulations! Now that I look at this one again I wonder if the other way around would work better. Outside: Congratulations! Inside: You did that on purpose didn't you? What do y'all think?
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Saturday, November 27, 2004
$100 bill
Here's a new one a just wrote while munching on a bagel this morning. Outside: I'm giving you a $100 bill for your birthday Inside: It's my electric bill, I'm hoping you can pay it. Happy Birthday
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Wednesday, November 24, 2004
Change of Address
Here's one I wrote yesterday and submitted to Andrews and McMeel. Outside: I'm giving you some change of address forms for your birthday Inside: You're moving into old age. Happy Birthday
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Tuesday, November 23, 2004
Turning Point
Here's one that just got rejected by Gallant Greetings, I'll be sending it elsewhere soon. Outside: Your birthday is a real turning point. Inside: Turning gray, turning wrinkled, turning senile. Happy Birthday.
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Monday, November 22, 2004
Snap Crackle Pop
A new one I just wrote on my lunch hour today. Outside: You know you're getting old when you hear "Snap, crackle, Pop... Inside: And you haven't even opened your cereal yet. Happy Birthday.
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Sunday, November 21, 2004
Current Events
A new one I wrote last week Outside: Another birthday? Why you're not old. Kids today are learning the same things you studied in current events. Inside: Only now it's history. Happy Birthday
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Saturday, November 20, 2004
Baseball Cards
This is a mother's day card I sold to American Greetings a few years ago. Outside: Mom, I know I'll never have enough money to pay you back for all the cooking, cleaning, shopping and driving you've done for me over the years. Inside: On the other hand, if you figure in the value of the baseball...
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Friday, November 19, 2004
Leaves me Breathless
I've never sold a card with a joke about the number of candles on the birthday cake but I keep writing them anyway. Outside: Your birthday leaves me breathless. Inside: Just the thought of trying to blow out all those candles. Happy Birthday.
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Thursday, November 18, 2004
Frozen Dinners
A new one I wrote earlier this week. Outside: If you have any leftover ice cream from your birthday party, you can eat it tomorrow evening. Inside: I know how much you like frozen dinners. Happy Birthday
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