Saturday, October 1, 2005
DID YOU MAKE THIS IMPORTANT LIST?
As you know, I’ve been dedicating most of my time towards setting up and organising my own terrorist group. I can now say with the utmost of confidence that I have assembled a dynamic team of infidels, crooks, lard violators and downright meanies to wage a bloody and violent jihad against the...
Sign in to see full entry.
Wednesday, September 21, 2005
I’ve Decided to Stop Making Love To My Mother.
There comes a time in an incestuous but attractive man’s life when his trusty mother’s “front pocket” is no longer desirable. Indeed, watching three of your own son-brothers being pushed out of it doesn’t help matters. Like the yeast infections she frequently passed on to me, memories of a head –...
Sign in to see full entry.
Thursday, September 8, 2005
Thought Is the First Step in Creation
Here’s a quick rundown of how the universe works: There in no time other than now Thought is the first step towards creation We all have the power of God We can all have whatever we desire because we command the universe But although we have the power to command the universe and get what we truly...
Sign in to see full entry.
Wednesday, September 7, 2005
Is it Fair to Keep Criticising Bush?
I feel sorry for President Bush. Here is a man who’s been working solidly for the last few months trying to find a good excuse to bomb Iran and all anyone wants to do is criticise his response to the puddle in New Orleans. What is wrong with people!? They seem to forget that it only took him a...
Sign in to see full entry.
Tuesday, September 6, 2005
I’VE CREATED A NEW TYPE OF THEME PARK
I have now filled the void in my life that was for so long getting me down. For years I’ve had nothing so good that it makes me want to share it with a million other people (other than my mother’s STDs). But now that I’ve completed building my theme park, I now have something magical I can share...
Sign in to see full entry.
Saturday, September 3, 2005
I’M A BLACKBELT WOMAN BEATER
I’ve created a brand new martial arts based solely on woman beating techniques. The name of this fighting discipline is Punch-ho. As Grand Master of Punch-ho, it is my advice that Punch-ho techniques should only be used as self defence from nagging, and general disobedience from your spouse. It’s...
Sign in to see full entry.
Friday, September 2, 2005
What is the Real Secret Behind the Da Vinci Code?
After spending considerable time reading the ‘ Da Vinci Code’, I figured out that there was a more intriguing secret code behind it all, wrapped up in a single eight letter word. That secret code word is ‘bollocks’. My conclusion therefore is ‘The Da Vinci Code’ is bollocks. I mean we’re talking...
Sign in to see full entry.
Saturday, July 9, 2005
IT'S TIME TO BOMB SOME COUNTRY
I’ve dreaded the day a terrorist attack comes to England. Not that I fear for my life or anyone else’s, but it’s the whole gigantic crap-a-thon that follows such an event. I’m talking about the mass hysteria and hyped up beyond belief media coverage. I can already smell the millions of people in...
Sign in to see full entry.
Sunday, June 26, 2005
AN AMAZING OPPORTUNITY FOR DEPRESSED PEOPLE: WHO IS THE BEST BLOGGER?
: Now you can have the lifestyle you truly deserve from this breakthrough wonder cure for depression. “They laughed when I said I was going to strap dynamite around my chest and run into a busy café screaming my pants off. Ha! Who’s laughing now, eh?” ~ Stephen Smith (deceased). Yes, this remarkable...
Sign in to see full entry.
Saturday, June 25, 2005
I PUT SPELLS ON PEOPLE WHO ANGER ME
I’ve been a witch now for over thirty three years. I began practicing witchcraft eight years prior to falling out of Mother’s front bottom. That’s how serious I am about it. Afters years of practising the standard witchcrafts (black, white, and mother-in-law), I have developed my own brand of “shit”...
Sign in to see full entry.
