Saturday, March 6, 2004
Bridging the attention span gap.
But I digress. There you have it, no B.S. Right up front you know that this will be one of those blogs that leaves you scratching someone else’s head. I will allow the train of thought to thoroughly de-rail and carom around like a ping pong ball. Speaking of which, have you noticed the sit-com 2 ½ Men has a line that has something to do with balls every week? Charlie has sort of a sheen about him in that show. Now we learn the Bush administration didn’t have a clear connection established...
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Wednesday, March 3, 2004
What are they trying to sell us?
Those cute insurance ads, you’ve seen the Gecko in the faux MG or whatever. The duck that strives valiantly to blurt out the name of the company but always seems to get upstaged. These ads are cute, humorous even, but have you considered, they may have a darker side? Subliminal messages and images that only the discerning mind can ferret out. Case in point: The Geico Lizard promotes unions. How can that be, you ask? Ok, follow me here, he is a lizard, working for scale! The Aflac Duck: This one...
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Tuesday, March 2, 2004
The highways’ siren song.
The lure of the open road has been the inspiration for many songs. Long stretches of blacktop and white lines beckon one to far-off adventures. But if you look at a highway sideways, it ain’t all that great.
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Monday, March 1, 2004
Ellen Degeneress.
I confess, I find Ellen attractive even though I know she plays for the other team. She is witty, goofy and pixie cute. At least to me. You never quite know where her mind is going to go. I suppose since I suffer the same ping-pong ball thought patterns that is the attraction. We probably could never have a conversation, too much digressing. So there it is, I like Ellen Degeneress and it could never be. Some things just aren’t fair.
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Sunday, February 29, 2004
World’s worst identity crisis.
I think I was Shirley McClain in another life! Isn’t it ironic that porn sites have a place called Member Log In? Or so I’ve heard. Ted Nugent, it’s Cat Scratch Fever not Chainsaw Shred Sweats. Motorcyclists tell each other, “Keep the rubber side down” but that is not good advice to a male porn star. Did you know that if you blog past midnight, you get silly? I just read where scientists can’t agree what time really is. They must be on salary.
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Friday, February 27, 2004
Bet you didn’t know.
There is a standard for porn writers to consult when they need to use the proper punctuation in writing adult sex-themed works. It is called, of course, the Comma Sutra. Heh Heh, I before E and Ooooh before Ahhhh, you’re all excused now. Howard Stern claimed that he was misunderstood. With all the space probes going to Mars and one scheduled for Venus, he only thought that somehow a probe should be headed for Uranus. ~Snark~
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Thursday, February 26, 2004
Name’s your poison.
The power of a name. Would Billy the Kid have been as feared had he gone by the moniker of William the Child, or perhaps William the Infant Goat? Probably not. How about George Shrub, leader of the free world? Stranger than even I could concoct is his Guard commander, Bristlecone! I’ll just pass on that one, seeing my last name is Palm, us trees gotta stand united. Or as they say, Dyslexics, untie! Sitting Bull, but for a quirk of gender oriented fate could have been Squatting Heifer. Then there...
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Monday, February 23, 2004
The Wi…er..Nextel Cup.
The Viagra car goes hard into the wall. Ok, so sponsors come and go, but the new crop threatens to stretch the announcers ability to call a race and keep from sounding like…well…like this… Today, Mr. Whipple will say those famous words, “Gentlemen…Start your engines.” Mr Whipple has been given this honor to welcome the Charmin Car to today’s lineup, here at the Tidybowl 500. “Hi, I’m Kon Ecrisimaki, famous race announcer and I have some important news. The Nextel Cup series will be sponsored...
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Sunday, February 22, 2004
Soap Operas
How many times are Josh and Reva going to play the yo-yo game? My wife tapes ATWT and GL to watch in the evenings as she unwinds from a day of accountant type number crunching. I attempt to amuse her by adding my own lines. When Reva asked, “Josh, I’m worried about Mara, do you know what is going on?”, my answer for Josh was, “hell Reva, you’r the psychic, you tell me!” And so it goes. I know I am doing a good job when she has to rewind the tape to hear the real lines, lame as they are. Talk...
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Saturday, February 21, 2004
Where is the sanity?
Turn almost anything into oil? The May 2003 Discover magazine has an article on a thermal depolymerization process “Anything into oil”. The process is being used to turn turkey offal (guts) into oil suitable for use as fuel. The technology is proven, so why haven’t we heard more about it? We have heard about hydrogen, but the problems are many and the time line is long. Thermal depolymerization is here now, so why are is our government ignorant of this promising technology? I urge you to go to...
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