The Joke Is On Big V

Saturday, March 14, 2015

Annual Dementia Test

#1. What do you put in a toaster? Answer: 'bread.' If you said 'toast', just give up now and go do something else. And, try not to hurt yourself. If you said, bread, go to Question #2. # 2. Say 'silk' five times. Now spell 'silk.' What do cows drink? Scroll down Answer: Cows drink water. If you said... Sign in to see full entry.

Joe Biden and Tequila

A new tell-all book about the Secret Service reveals that agents try to avoid protecting the vice-president because he frequently likes to go skinny-dipping. The worst part is, that’s just in the mall fountain. “Sir, it says to put your PENNIES in here, not…” Rumors that Kim Kardashian and Paris... Sign in to see full entry.

Friday, March 13, 2015

Target the Kardasians

The Kardashians refuse to air any new ‘Keeping Up with the Kardashians’ until police find who robbed their house. Which explains why today police stopped looking. Target announced that Pepsi executive Brian Cornell will become the company's new CEO. Target actually wanted a Coke executive, but its... Sign in to see full entry.

Thursday, March 12, 2015

Beating Kim and Just Up... Again!

The Kardashians' home has been burglarized three times this year. Still, no arrests. LA police say, “If only there was a video record of what goes on in the Kardashian home." An Oregon man called police to report traffic stopped by a chicken crossing the road. Next day he calls to report a priest... Sign in to see full entry.

Wednesday, March 11, 2015

Kim And Justin... What a Pair!

New Apple iPhone out this week with a larger screen, more memory, and it can leak celebrity photos twice as fast. Apple introduces a smart watch that can text, monitor health and even pay bills. Asked if the Apple Watch also tells time, Apple’s CEO said, “Oh, dang it!" Three airline flights had to... Sign in to see full entry.

Tuesday, March 10, 2015

Kim Kardashian and Recycling

Doctors have discovered a 24-year-old Chinese woman who's lived her whole life without a major part of her brain. They’re calling her “the lost Kardashian." A Baltimore Ravens player has retired to donate a kidney to his brother. Since receiving the new kidney, the brother has committed six... Sign in to see full entry.

Monday, March 9, 2015

Four Days? Don't Be Corny!

Vladimir Putin’s 62d birthday was the other day. When he got his presents he said, “You didn’t have to get me anything, I could have just taken it.” California has become the first state to totally ban plastic bags. Gov. Jerry Brown says, “Plastic has no place in California unless it's in our... Sign in to see full entry.

Sunday, March 8, 2015

My Pen Is Dry

Have you guys seen the new documentary about white trash? I only saw the trailer. How do you tell when you're out of invisible ink? If everything seems to be going well, you have obviously overlooked something. When everything is coming your way, you're in the wrong lane. Sign in to see full entry.

Saturday, March 7, 2015

Shoot, Pretend You Didn't Hear This

Brian Williams is reporting that he is doing alright after his near death incident when he and Harrison Ford were shot out of the sky in LA. I was invited to a costume party last weekend and was told to "dress to kill." Apparently wearing a turban, fake beard, and a backpack was what they had in... Sign in to see full entry.

Tuesday, March 3, 2015

my grandpa is still in the hospital. They said he had something with a bad heart rhythm. I think he said A fibb or something like that on the phone. He thinks he will get out tomorrow. they have a Iv going that is getting him medicines for it. Sign in to see full entry.

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