The Joke Is On Big V

Friday, June 30, 2017

This Is Why I Have Two Nikons & Three Canons

* You know you’re ugly when it comes to a group picture and they hand you the camera. Sign in to see full entry.

Thursday, June 29, 2017

Golfer? Goofer? Is There A Difference?

Marvin found the following ransom note slipped under his front door. “Bring $50,000 to the 17th hole of your country club tomorrow at 10:00 AM if you ever want to see your wife alive again.” The next day, it was well after 1:00 PM by the time he arrived at the designated meeting spot. A masked man... Sign in to see full entry.

Wednesday, June 28, 2017

Maybe She Should Have Reset Her Garmin

His wife’s graveside service was just barely finished, when there was a massive clap of thunder, followed by a tremendous bolt of lightning, accompanied by even more thunder rumbling in the distance. The little, old man looked at the pastor and calmly said, “Well, she’s there.” Sign in to see full entry.

Monday, June 26, 2017

I Have Twelve Forty Five Myself!

A man was telling his neighbor in Port Charlotte, "I just bought a new hearing aid. It cost me four thousand dollars, but it’s state of the art. It’s perfect." "Really," answered the neighbor. "What kind is it?" "Twelve thirty." Sign in to see full entry.

Sunday, June 25, 2017

Pass The Butter

A few days after his wife disappeared in a kayaking accident, a Bar Harbor man answered his door to find two grim-faced Harbor Master officers. “We’re sorry Mr. Flynn, but we have some information about your wife,”. “Tell me! Did you find her?!” Cedric Flynn asked. One officer said, “We have some... Sign in to see full entry.

Saturday, June 24, 2017

I Prefer Plastic

The Flower show Two little old ladies, Connie & Evelyn, were sitting on a park bench outside the local town hall where a flower show was in progress. They, each, had often shared stories of their much lively earlier years. Connie leaned over to her friend and said, “Life is so boring these days, we... Sign in to see full entry.

Friday, June 23, 2017

I Never Fell For This Trap!

Wife: “How would you describe me?” Husband: “ABCDEFGHIJK.” Wife: “What does that mean?” Husband: “Adorable, beautiful, cute, delightful, elegant, fashionable, gorgeous, and hot.” Wife: “Aw, thank you, but what about IJK?” Husband: “I’m just kidding!” The doctor figures that he might be able to see... Sign in to see full entry.

Wednesday, June 21, 2017

Fine? I Feel Great!

A farmer named Clyde had an accident with a semi while driving his tractor. In court, the trucking company’s fancy hot shot lawyer, was questioning Clyde. “Didn’t you say, at the scene of the accident, ‘I’m fine,’?” asked the lawyer. Clyde responded, “Well, I’ll tell you what happened. I had just... Sign in to see full entry.

Tuesday, June 20, 2017

At Least Give It A Try!

A Tennessee State trooper pulled a car over on I-24 about 2 miles east of Nashville, Tennessee. When the trooper asked the driver why he was speeding, the driver said he was a Magician and Juggler and was on his way to Nashville to do a show for the Childrens Hospital. He didn’t want to be late. The... Sign in to see full entry.

Sunday, June 18, 2017

A Cheap Laugh

* What lies on its back, one hundred feet in the air? A dead centipede. Sign in to see full entry.

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