Thursday, August 5, 2004
argh, I need writing help.
I need encouragement. I need to keep plugging away. I need concentration and I need focus. I need flow and I need drive. I need approval. I need validation. I need my creative high, my adventure high, and my power high. I need immortality. Look at me! Help me! Read me!!!! "Katrina" needs help. It is a mess. Luckily it's been in my head for at least a year, so it's all in there somewhere...but it needs some structure help, not to mention Cheese-Factor Reduction Treatment. The scary story was...
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Monday, August 2, 2004
my whole weekend was a tantrum
From which I am now peacefully recovering.:) It is slow going, but I think we covered some ground and got past some things in what seems to be my initiation into an adult relationship and deeper friendship with (God? Jesus? the Lord? I lose track of "whom" I'm dealing with, which is something I'll also have to work through soon I suppose.) It started, I suppose, with a female friend's party...where I was unsure of how to be since I had gone in a direction with the Lord I could not turn back...
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Wednesday, July 28, 2004
WITHOUT KNOWING.
Those are the words God has specifically for me today. There is no question in my mind...it resonates so strongly that I have an urge to put it somewhere, maybe everywhere, where it can remind me...on my wall at home, in my wallet, on an item of clothing, perhaps, if I'm really bold. Without knowing where Without knowing why, Without knowing how, Without knowing when. I was needled at first by encountering yet another chapter on "surrendering" to God by yet another pedestaled Christian writer....
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Monday, July 26, 2004
Thinking about Affirmative Action
Gradually, my fence-sitting further decreases: I'm not 100% certain yet, but I think I am against affirmative action OR I am strongly on the side of those who say it needs to be greatly reformed. Part of this decision, though in the making for months now (maybe even years) might be heavliy influenced by the fact that seeing American History X kept me awake most of the night. I'm still having obsessive-compulsive images of the boy's head being split on the pavement relentlessly playing in my...
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Thursday, July 22, 2004
The future of voting...?
I didn't pay as much attention as I should have in government class. *sigh* I remember something once about different ways of voting; there's "majority," and "plurality," and like two other ways. Or maybe that was my freshman year of college in practical math. Or both. Because, at the time, I was too brain-washed to realize how incredible an organ the human brain is, I still had a mental block that kept me from being able to take in much information that was of a mathematical nature! Eventually,...
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Life Having a “Purpose”: The Verdict
Partly inspired by GomeDome's post yesterday on the gradual disappearance of religion (thanks for always giving me a lot to think about, I love it!), and partly by a book I'm reading for my own personal reasons, I've got this subject on the brain. It’s been rattling around in there subconsciously for a while, however, and now I think I have a viewpoint that can be put into words. Don't fry me please. In response to the question posed in GomeDome’s entry, I’m not sure if religion will disappear...
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Wednesday, July 21, 2004
Enraged by Harrassment...and feeling powerless
I have a right to ride home on a city bus after a long day of work just like anyone else, without any trouble, right? I have rights that are protected by the laws of this country, supposedly. Apparently these days, in order to have the law step in, you either have to be brutalized enough to disturb other peoples' sensibilities, or you have to be provoked enough to break the law yourself. Recently I was riding the bus home and a guy whom I am pretty certain was somewhat drunk got on the bus,...
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Tuesday, July 20, 2004
A bit of Background for this Journal.
I am SO tired. Still having difficulty sleeping well in my new apartment. But at least I'm sleeping I suppose. So, seems I've taken to listening to the Bible on cd at night. Let me back up a bit. I'm writing this grudgingly, you know. I don't know why, but this isn't easy for me to talk about. I graduated from college in 2002, then went to this "bible college" for four months. I was supposed to be there for 2 years, but after I came home for winter break, I decided I didn't want to go back. Life...
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