I am here and I am not silent

By kidnykid - About Me - E-mail this page - Add to My Favorites - Add to Blog List - See other blogs in Health & Fitness

Monday, June 14, 2004

Is it love, or is it abuse?

One of the warning signs I should have looked for - but was too naive to do - was to become sensitized to the possibility that my former partner was rushing things just a bit. We were holding hands on the first date, and we became intimate almost right away, as well. This is a cardinal warning sign... Sign in to see full entry.

posted by kidnykid at 11:28 PM Comments (3) (link)

Sunday, June 6, 2004

Telling all

This is one of the most significant boundary violations I have had to deal with in my life. I seem to be surrounded by people who know they don't have permission to talk about me but do so anyway. In fact, I joke about them buying billboards on the local tollway for premium prices just to make sure... Sign in to see full entry.

posted by kidnykid at 10:25 AM Comments (5) (link)

Friday, June 4, 2004

Boundaries

This is such an important topic relating to abuse that I'm surprised I hadn't thought of covering it before. I have always thought that the term "boundaries" referred simply to having a strong identity. In other words, if you are someone who knows yourself well, you likely have strong boundaries... Sign in to see full entry.

posted by kidnykid at 12:52 PM Comments (0) (link)

Friday, May 28, 2004

Where does this fit in?

I've told this story on Themestream, so those of you who used to write for that site might recognize it. I was wondering how to tie it in to abuse issues, until I thought about it for a little bit. I remember a time when I wore a pair of pants my former partner just didn't like. Now, I'm not saying... Sign in to see full entry.

posted by kidnykid at 12:13 PM Comments (0) (link)

Thursday, May 27, 2004

Intelligent disobedience

The title of this post comes from something I learned about training guide dogs for the blind. In addition to all the normal temperament tests dogs are put through to see if they'd be suitable, one of the things guide dogs are trained to do is to use good judgment. A well-trained guide dog will balk... Sign in to see full entry.

posted by kidnykid at 9:40 AM Comments (0) (link)

Wednesday, May 26, 2004

The things some people think

In reading Pecanflower's blog Lesbian Lessons this afternoon, I was reminded of something my informant told me about my former boyfriend. Long after we broke up, he got the idea in his mind (aided and abetted by a friend of his) that I had attacked him using psychic means. Now, it must be understood... Sign in to see full entry.

posted by kidnykid at 12:16 PM Comments (0) (link)

Tuesday, May 25, 2004

The hazards of breaking up

This is something I didn't cover in my last post, much to my everlasting regret. I have read that it is often more dangerous to be separated from an abusive partner than it is to be with him. I think there are a number of reasons for this. First of all, when you're with him or her, you belong to... Sign in to see full entry.

posted by kidnykid at 5:33 PM Comments (0) (link)

Friday, May 21, 2004

Handling breakups

Just today, I was reading one of my favorite bloggers, Pecanflower, talk about her breakup with her spouse, J. I believe strongly that she is doing the right thing; however, her experience brought back a lot of memories for me of relationships gone by. Specifically, I was reminded of something I'd... Sign in to see full entry.

posted by kidnykid at 2:37 PM Comments (3) (link)

Wednesday, May 19, 2004

How to manipulate someone into supporting you

I gave this post the title I did because I was reminded of my former boyfriend when I was researching the topic this morning. I've mentioned before - briefly - that my former boyfriend would support himself by padding his credit card bills, telling his mother (who handled the family finances) that... Sign in to see full entry.

posted by kidnykid at 10:39 AM Comments (2) (link)

Tuesday, May 18, 2004

Acceptance and healing

Not too long ago, I wrote about the five stages of grief, and I hope I applied some of those stages to the process of abuse recovery. It is my theory that one must first learn to accept that one is being abused before one can truly recover from abuse. Victims continually either deny that they are... Sign in to see full entry.

posted by kidnykid at 9:39 AM Comments (0) (link)

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About this Blog
The name of the post is derived from a Francis Schaeffer book, and intended to rebut something I'd seen on the Internet. The blog itself is about what I've learned about relationships from the ones I've had, and the ones I've observed. It will not be pleasant to read, and might wander off-topic occasionally, but is intended to be a long-term blog reading like a public journal.

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