Wednesday, May 4, 2005
This really happened to me
When I was dating my former boyfriend, I remember wearing a pair of pants which had the advantage of being free of charge (I was on the typical undergraduate starvation budget at the time). My former boyfriend - as is his privilege - decided he didn't like the pants. What he did wrong was to taunt... Sign in to see full entry.
posted by kidnykid at 11:46 AM Comments (1) (link)
Friday, April 29, 2005
The basics of my story
I started dating my former boyfriend in April of 1975. I was so desperate for a male companion that I would have dated a scarecrow had one come to life. It was not unusual for me to put up with a lot of verbal and emotional abuse. In some of his writings, he claims by implication that we had a... Sign in to see full entry.
posted by kidnykid at 1:15 PM Comments (0) (link)
Thursday, April 28, 2005
Remaining silent
There are two choices any abuse survivor has: remaining silent or telling one's story in order to help those who are being victimized right now. Based on the research I have done on domestic violence, my impression is that abusers would rather we remained silent. It is in this way that they avoid... Sign in to see full entry.
posted by kidnykid at 2:55 PM Comments (3) (link)
Wednesday, April 27, 2005
One sign among many
In reading a list of signs of abuse, I found one that really stood out for me. The list of signs includes a rush to pressure the victim into committing to a long-term relationship. What this means is that often on the first date, a potential abuser will expect that his or her victim will want to be... Sign in to see full entry.
posted by kidnykid at 12:43 PM Comments (0) (link)
Tuesday, April 26, 2005
You learn something new every day
Reading the comments to my last post, I was struck by something unusual - someone else reported the same phenomenon I experienced. My point in mentioning this is that there is strength in numbers, and that there is more to the issue of domestic violence than I figured. In the comments section of my... Sign in to see full entry.
posted by kidnykid at 12:07 PM Comments (0) (link)
Monday, April 25, 2005
Characteristics of the abuser
This website details some common characteristics of abusers, with the understanding that not every characteristic is common to each individual abuser. I would like to add some characteristics which are not specifically mentioned on the website. For instance, look at the way your intended treats... Sign in to see full entry.
posted by kidnykid at 10:44 AM Comments (4) (link)
Friday, April 22, 2005
BDSM and abuse
This is a topic of interest to me because my former boyfriend is heavily "into" BDSM, or bondage, discipline, sadism and masochism. (You can get some idea of his preferences by reading this website.) I don't know if this is still true, but the SM part of BDSM (standing for sexual Sadism and sexual... Sign in to see full entry.
posted by kidnykid at 10:17 AM Comments (0) (link)
This website, produced by the American Bar Association, gives readers some idea of who is at special risk of being abused in an intimate relationship. Evidently, the major risk factor is simply being female. In hetrerosexual relationships, the vast majority of victims of abuse are female. I believe,... Sign in to see full entry.
posted by kidnykid at 9:04 AM Comments (5) (link)
Thursday, August 12, 2004
A post I'd like you to read
I would like you to read this post, in my blog My Journal. It's important, and it explains a lot of references to "my informant" in the blog you are currently reading. Thanks. Sign in to see full entry.
posted by kidnykid at 7:20 AM Comments (0) (link)
Thursday, July 8, 2004
Thanks!
Editormum left a very insightful comment on one of my other blogs which has some relevance to this blog. I've been stuck in something of a "pity the poor abuse survivor" mode while writing this blog. That's why I haven't written in here very much - I don't want to be stuck in that mode, but I'm... Sign in to see full entry.
posted by kidnykid at 10:30 AM Comments (0) (link)
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About this Blog
The name of the post is derived from a Francis Schaeffer book, and intended to rebut something I'd seen on the Internet. The blog itself is about what I've learned about relationships from the ones I've had, and the ones I've observed. It will not be pleasant to read, and might wander off-topic occasionally, but is intended to be a long-term blog reading like a public journal.  Links
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