Naut's Funnies...

By Nautikos - About Me - E-mail this page - Add to My Favorites - Add to Blog List - See other blogs in Humor

Monday, February 25, 2013

A blonde was shopping at K-Mart and came across a shiny silver thermos.

She was quite fascinated by it, so she picked it up and took it over to the clerk to ask what it was. The clerk said, "Why, that's a thermos....it keeps hot things hot and cold things cold." "Wow," said the blonde, "that's amazing....I'm going to buy it!" She bought the thermos and took it to work... Sign in to see full entry.

Sunday, February 24, 2013

A blonde was having sharp pains in her abdomen...

and went to see her doctor. The doctor examined her and said, ''You have acute appendicitis.'' The blonde yelled at him, ''I came here to get medical help, not get a stupid compliment!!'' Sign in to see full entry.

Saturday, February 23, 2013

Waiting at a cross walk, a blonde asked why the signal was buzzing.

"That's to let blind people know when the light is red," said her boyfriend. "Oh, my God," she said, "what in the world are blind people doing driving?" Sign in to see full entry.

Wednesday, February 20, 2013

A blonde teenager had been talking on the phone for about half an hour...

and then she hung up. "Wow!," said her father, "That was short. You usually talk for two hours. What happened?" "Wrong number…" Sign in to see full entry.

Tuesday, February 19, 2013

I was walking into the washroom, and there was my blonde girlfriend...

standing in front of the mirror with her eyes closed. I asked her, “What are you doing, sweetie?” “Oh,” she said, “I’m just trying to see what I look like when I’m asleep...” Sign in to see full entry.

Monday, February 18, 2013

Three blondes just died and are at the Pearly Gates of Heaven.

St. Peter tells them they can enter the gates if they can answer one simple question. St. Peter asks the first blonde, "What is Easter?" The blonde replies, "Oh, that's easy, it's the holiday in November when everyone gets together, eats turkey, and are thankful..." "Wrong!" replies St. Peter, and... Sign in to see full entry.

Sunday, February 17, 2013

Two blondes are sitting at Starbucks when a truckload of sod rolls by...

Says one blonde to the other, "One day when I get rich I want to be able do that!" “Do what?” "Have my yard sent out to be mowed...." Sign in to see full entry.

Saturday, February 16, 2013

One day this blonde went to the clinic for a pregnancy test...

"We'll," said the doctor, "it looks like you're pregnant." "Oh my God," she said, "is it mine?" Sign in to see full entry.

Friday, February 15, 2013

Two blondes living in Oklahoma were sitting on a bench talking ...

and one blonde says to the other one, "Which do you think is farther away - Florida or the Moon?" The other blonde turns and says "Hellooooooo, can you see Florida...?" Sign in to see full entry.

Wednesday, February 13, 2013

A police officer stops a blonde for speeding...

and asks her very nicely if he could see her license. She replied in a huff, "I wish you people could get your act together. Just yesterday one of you guys takes away my license and now today you expect me to show it to you." Sign in to see full entry.

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