Naut's Funnies...

By Nautikos - About Me - E-mail this page - Add to My Favorites - Add to Blog List - See other blogs in Humor

Sunday, March 10, 2013

A blonde was talking to her brunette friend...

about her boyfriend's dandruff problem. The brunette said, "Well, why don't you give him Head and Shoulders?" “Oh,” replied the blonde, "How do you give shoulders?" Sign in to see full entry.

Saturday, March 9, 2013

A blonde walks into a restaurant and sits down...

and while she's deciding on what she wants a waitress comes up. The blonde looks up and notices the waitress's name tag on her shirt. "Gee, that's nice,” she says. “What did you name the other one?" Sign in to see full entry.

Thursday, March 7, 2013

A blonde is walking down the street, with her blouse open.

A cop is approaching from about a block away, thinking, "Boy, my eyes must be going, it looks like that blonde’s right breast is hanging out." As he gets closer it becomes apparent that her breast is hanging out. When he gets face to face with her he says, "Ma'am, are you aware I could cite you for... Sign in to see full entry.

Tuesday, March 5, 2013

A blonde was doing 60 in a 25 mile per hour residential zone...

when a police cruiser pulled her over. The female police officer who walked up to the car also happened to be a blonde. She asked for the blonde's driver's license. The driver dug around in her purse for a while and finally said to the blonde policewoman, "What does a driver's license look like?”... Sign in to see full entry.

Monday, March 4, 2013

Three blondes were walking through the forest...

when they came upon a set of tracks. The first blonde said, "Those are deer tracks." The second blonde said, "No, those are elk tracks." The third blonde said, "You're both wrong, those are moose tracks." The blondes were still arguing when the train hit them... Sign in to see full entry.

Sunday, March 3, 2013

A blonde is walking along the street...

...when she suddenly falls into an uncovered manhole. Covered in muck, she slowly crawls her way back up a rusty ladder. When she gets to the top, she wipes the sweat off her brow and says, “Thank God the hole wasn’t covered, or I would have never made it out!” Sign in to see full entry.

Saturday, March 2, 2013

Returning home from work, a blonde was horrified to find...

that she had been robbed. She telephoned the police at once and reported the crime. The police dispatcher broadcast the call on all channels, and a K-9 unit patrolling nearby was the first to respond. As the K-9 officer approached the house with his dog on a leash, the blonde ran out on the porch,... Sign in to see full entry.

Thursday, February 28, 2013

A blonde died and went to Heaven.

When she got to the Pearly Gates, she met St. Peter who said, "Before I can let you in, you have to pass a test." "Oh, no!" she said, but St. Pete said not to worry, he'd make it easy. And he asked her, "Who was God's son?" The blonde thought for a few minutes and then said "Andy!" "Andy??? Who the... Sign in to see full entry.

Wednesday, February 27, 2013

After many years of trying, this blonde finally got her driver’s license.

When it was handed to her, she looked at it, screamed and broke out in tears. “What’s the matter, hon?” said her boyfriend, very concerned. “I can’t believe it,” she sobbed, “they gave me an F in sex...” Sign in to see full entry.

Tuesday, February 26, 2013

A blonde strode angrily into the store, slapped a package on the counter...

and loudly expressed her dissatisfaction. The clerk asked, "What's the problem? Wouldn't your cat eat them?" The blonde's eyes got very large, and she whispered, "Do you mean to tell me that 'Pussy Treats' are meant for cats?" Sign in to see full entry.

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