Mag's Bag

By MaggieMae - About Me - E-mail this page - Add to My Favorites - Add to Blog List - See other blogs in Humor

Wednesday, March 28, 2007

Delia's Way vs The Real Woman's Way.............

Delia's Way 1 Stuff a miniature marshmallow in the bottom of a sugar cone to prevent ice cream drips. The Real Woman's Way Just suck the ice cream out of the bottom of the cone, for God's sake. You are probably lying on the couch with your feet up eating it anyway. Delia's Way 2 To keep potatoes... Sign in to see full entry.

Sunday, March 25, 2007

You Think English Is Easy???..............

1) The bandage was wound around the wound. 2) The farm was used to produce produce. 3) The dump Can you read these right the first time? was so full that it had to refuse more refuse. 4) We must polish the Polish furniture. 5) He could lead if he would get the lead out. 6) The soldier decided to... Sign in to see full entry.

Thursday, March 22, 2007

They Walk Among Us.......................

I walked into a Quizno's with a buy-one-get-one-free coupon for a sandwich. I handed it to the girl and she looked over at a little chalkboard that said "buy one-get one free". "They're already buy-one-get-one-free," she said, "so I guess they're both free." She handed me my free sandwiches and I... Sign in to see full entry.

Monday, March 19, 2007

Dear Abby (these are a hoot).........

LETTERS THAT EVEN "DEAR ABBY" ADMITTED SHE WAS AT A LOSS TO ANSWER Dear Abby, A couple of women moved in across the hall from me. One is a middle-aged gym teacher and the other is a social worker in her mid twenties. These two women go everywhere together and I've never seen a man go into or leave... Sign in to see full entry.

Friday, March 16, 2007

Crabby Old Man...........

When an old man died in the geriatric ward of a small hospital near Tampa, Florida, it was believed that he had nothing left of any value. Later, when the nurses were going through his meager possessions, they found this poem. Its quality and content so impressed the staff that copies were made and... Sign in to see full entry.

Thursday, March 8, 2007

The Power of the Positive!

The Cracked Pot A Chinese Fable A water bearer in China had two large pots, each hung on the ends of a pole which he carried across his neck. One pot had a crack in it, while the other pot was perfect and always delivered a full portion of water. At the end of the long walk from the stream to the... Sign in to see full entry.

Monday, March 5, 2007

The Stranger...........

A few years after I was born, my Dad met a stranger who was new to our small town. From the beginning, Dad was fascinated with this enchanting newcomer and soon invited him to live with our family. The stranger was quickly accepted and was around from then on. As I grew up, I never questioned his... Sign in to see full entry.

Wednesday, February 28, 2007

A Special Program For Us All, INSTALLING LOVE

Tech Support: Yes,. How can I help you? Customer: Well, after much consideration, I've decided to install Love. Can you guide me through the process? Tech Support: Yes. I can help you. Are you ready to proceed? Customer: Well, I'm not very technical, but I think I'm ready. What do I do first? Tech... Sign in to see full entry.

Sunday, January 7, 2007

January Poem.................

The Month After Christmas TÂ’was the month after Christmas, and all through the house Nothing would fit me, not even a blouse. The cookies IÂ’d nibbled, the eggnog IÂ’d taste At the holiday parties had gone to my waist. When I got on the scale there arose such a number! When I walked to the store... Sign in to see full entry.

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