Enigmatic Static

It was about 2 A.M. and my tummy had a rumbly. I have really weird bowl movements. Not really movements, more like epic ass battles. I lift myself off of the comfy recliner and prepare to go to war. Running, smacking face first into the wall, clenching my butt as I ran. I made it to the throne room.... Sign in to see full entry.

Today was one of those days when you just feel kind of nervous. Maybe no one else feels this way, but sometimes I get all freaked out. I could be driving and day dream that the car coming at me is going to swerve at the last minute and smash me head on. Sometimes I'm outside grilling and can just... Sign in to see full entry.

Jesus Jones is my favorite band. Everyone has forgotten about them. Remember they had that song Right Here, Right Now. That was actually the song Bill Clinton used for his campaign theme in the early ninties. The song came from the albumn Doubt. The CD cover had a picture of a funny looking little... Sign in to see full entry.

Ever seen Dragon Ball Z? The characters power themselves up and become Sayan. Vegeta seems to have the worst encounter with this. If I could talk to the dude I would be like relax man. He seems very constipated. Stop eating so much cheese dude. His veins are bulging and hair stands on end. I have... Sign in to see full entry.

Yes this will some times come out of me bum. That Tuna Salad sure did a number on my rhoids. It is funny to me, you know farting and all. Everyone does it. J-Lo farts. She probably squeeks them out and then stops doing whatever to see if any one noticed. President Bush farts. He has a weapon of mass... Sign in to see full entry.

Super Pokemon tonight. This thing is freakin rock solid. Pulsating and throbbing. I am over excited. I grabbed the nearest bottle of lube. It was a pink bottle bursting with lotion, so I thought. I began to rub my man hood with this putrid concoction. Yes! Yes!. I stroked and double fisted that... Sign in to see full entry.

Been a while since I've done some wacky freewriting, here goes. Purple fog descends upon my machine gun Greed has torn through my face again Fetus dancing within the pacemaker, He is a faker The desert is lonely with the sweat and semen of the camel Tear his spleen from hump and eat the chunk of... Sign in to see full entry.

Wow! Evil Vs. Evil. I loved the cartoons He-Man and G.I. Joe when I was growing up. For some reason I felt that I wanted them to win at least one time. The Joes and He-Man were always whooping their asses. I relate this to the Wile E. Coyote Vs. Roadrunner. Imagine if he would have caught that bird.... Sign in to see full entry.

A TERROR IN THE TOILET 2.0 I stayed awake well beyond bedtime. Purpose? I had to make lunch for work tomorrow. heh heh My 3 AM session was becoming quite tedious. My can opener was messing up. Drastically smashed that little damn can of tuna open finally. I was on the prowl for some tuna salad. I am... Sign in to see full entry.

Ask for the sequel to the Terror In The Toilet story. I promise not to disappoint. Float on!!! Sign in to see full entry.